BENGALURU: Author Ashwini Devare has been receiving a lot of questions lately about why she chose to write a memoir at the age of 51, when she isn’t ‘a celebrity or old enough to write one’. Her latest book, Lost At 15, Found At 50, chronicles the author’s life and experiences of living in Moscow at the height of the Cold War, in America during the Vietnam War, in Sikkim during the pro-democracy movement and more.
Recently in the city for the launch of the same, she told CE, “I don’t believe there is a prescribed age and stage to pen a memoir, if you feel a compelling desire to tell your story, you should do so right away.”
While some write memoirs to heal or share one’s past, Devare says writing the book helped her understand who she is today, what got her here and helped her relive her past choices.
She compares the experience to walking into a house that has been locked up for years and found it thrilling to re-open the doors and windows as it brought back all those old memories. She said, “I’ve been wanting to write this book for years, but I wasn’t ready earlier. Since the story is so personal, I felt I needed the distance to write about it.”
Always the new girl
By the age of 15, Devare had already lived in six countries, from Gangtok to Geneva, as her father, an Indian Foreign Service officer, was posted in a new place almost every two years.
She recalls how her sister and she would play a ‘game of names’ where they would guess where their father would be posted to next and since they had no say in the matter, the verdict would either be a huge shock or a pleasant surprise.
“I began to appreciate my nomadic life much later, as an adult. The incredible exposure I had to different cultures and languages was an education no school or college can impart,” she said.
While she did learn a lot through the constant moving around, Devare adds that she is slightly envious of her friends who go to school and college reunions.
Since social media didn’t exist during her days in school, she was unable to keep in touch with her peers as she moved countries, and still wonders where they might be today.
“I was always the ‘new girl’. I had a Swiss friend called Isabelle in Geneva. I was the only Indian in the school and no one spoke English, but Isabelle didn’t let that come in our way. We became good friends. After my family left Geneva in 1979, I never met her again,” she recalls.
Living in the midst of war
The author was born in Moscow and though she was too young to recall what it was like to live in Russia when it was firmly entrenched behind the Iron Curtain, she recalls how her parents described life back then.
“My mother tells me I loved Russian milk, which I drank in copious amounts the first year of my life. Back then, there were constant shortages and serpentine queues for milk, clothing, meat etc, which were intrinsic to everyday life,” she says.
Having moved around a lot, the author considers home with what feels familiar and comforting, and adds that she is fortunate to feel at home in many places.
“In Delhi, where my parents live, in Singapore, where I live, in the US, where my sister lives, in Pune where my family comes from, in Bengaluru, where my uncles, aunts and cousins live. They’re all home to me,” she adds.
While she has experimented with short stories and now,a memoir, Devare next plans to write a novel. Though she has many ideas in mind, getting started is the most ‘daunting’ part of the writing process for her. However, she does hope to get down to it before the year ends.