Relax, results are not the end

With the TN Board HSC results just around the corner, many students are faced with the fear of failure and underperformance.
Students checking their results
Students checking their results

With the TN Board HSC results just around the corner, many students are faced with the fear of failure and underperformance. There is a pressing need for parents and teachers to counsel students and help them tide over this stressful period.

CHENNAI: You’re locked in your room, staring at the computer screen. Pearls of sweat trickle down your forehead while you type the ‘Exam ID’ and press the enter button. It’s the moment of truth — your Class 12 exam results — everything you worked so hard for till now. Wait. Take a deep breath first..and then do it a few more time until you calm down.
With the TN Board HSC results 2017 to be declared on May 12, it’s a stressful time for both students and parents. To help cope with the burden of expectations, experts opine that parents and teachers need to be supportive to the youngsters so that they are prepared for what’s coming. CE chats with psychologists, teachers, parents and students to know more about how the ‘result fever’ has hit them and what can be done to ease the pressure…

Aakash,(17), who’s waiting for his results, says he’s expecting good marks but is still stressed. “I try my best not to think about it. I swim a lot to take my mind off the results. But I am also nervous because I want to be able to get into a good college for a B tech degree. I hope I score well!” he says.
Psychologist Lakshmi Vijayakumar opines that parents should convey a deeper message to their children — that there’s more to life than marks. “If a child receives lesser marks than expected or fails the exam, parents generally blame children for watching TV and/or listening to music during studies. Instead, they should acknowledge that the child had given the best of efforts and make sure they know how to deal with failure of any kind,” she shares.

With impulsive decision-making and suicides becoming common during the result time, both parents and teachers have to become ‘in-house counsellors’. According to National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB), every hour, one student commits suicide in India (2015) and the number of student deaths reached 955 in Tamil Nadu alone. “Quantitative comparison of marks, peer pressure, self-doubt and poor coping skills lead to impulsive suicide attempts. So, it’s the duty of parents and teachers to make sure that the child has the support system to cope. The child should have the confidence that his/her parent will never give up on them,” opines Mohan Raj, a psychiatrist.

MS Padma, a commerce teacher at Mohamad Sathak School, says that expecting a child to score beyond his/her capacity is not right and advices parents to discuss alternate career/courses with their children. “Everyone is skilled in some way, and parents should tap these skills. If your kids fail to score, it’s not the end of the world. There are several legends who have been successful without scoring full marks in Math!” she quips.
But she also says that the scenario today has changed somewhat, for the better. “Three to four years ago, everyone was concerned about marks. But now only 60% are like that…40% know they can create a good future for themselves without getting good marks — all thanks to new opportunities and platforms that are available,” she adds.

Though a Plan B will most likely come handy when Plan A goes haywire, parents like Sunitha Ramakrishnan* stay grounded to their ideologies. “I wanted to become a doctor but I failed to become one. I didn’t have the finances back then…but now, I can support my daughter to become one and I know that’s ‘best’ for her,” she beams.
But, ask her daughter Saikripa* about her ambition and pat comes the reply: “I want to become a professional chef! That’s been my goal. But I took up a science group, struggled through it for two years and finally wrote my exams. I hope I just get the required cut-off mark,” she quips.

How to cope
Play a sport…from swimming to taking a quick jog, any physical activity will help ease the pressure.
Don’t feel disappointed with your marks. You might feel others have done better than you. Look at the bigger picture and plan for your future.
Be around people who give you the time to relax and think productively.
Refrain from posting messages or sharing results on social media. It gives temporary relief/satisfaction, but inculcates a narcissistic habit in a longer run.
Discuss alternative career and course options.
Combat stress by eating a healthy and balanced meal.
Replace self-criticism with self-correction
Reach out and talk: Talk to your parents and get professional help in case of extreme levels of anxiety and stress.

Parents can help...

  •  In case of failure or otherwise, support unconditionally
  • Advice children on how they can find their footing and bounce back
  • Give time and support to process and overcome failure
  • Don’t set unrealistic expectations

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