CHENNAI: The grief of a loss of pet is often considered an unusual occurrence in our culture. However, recent studies conducted on pet owners suggest that the emotions that are experienced upon the loss of a pet can be more intense compared to what many have felt when their acquaintances have moved on. The stages of grief are just as valid when your loss is an animal. The demise of one’s beloved companion is every pet owner’s worst fear. Severe grief from the loss, resulting in major life disruption is not an uncommon phenomenon.
Ishita Lamba, an arts student still recalls the emotional trauma she went through after her four-year-old dog passed away. “It happened when we were taking him from Hyderabad to Chandigarh. It was the airline’s fault. My world just stopped. I couldn’t digest the fact that he wasn’t there anymore. People around you don’t realise the trauma you’re experiencing inside because only you know the kind of pain you feel. He was brought to me on my birthday and this made him even closer to me, I was the most attached to him.
It seemed impossible to eat or sleep for a while and all I wanted was to be left alone to gauge what exactly happened. Getting another pet is just a solution but nobody can ever replace the memory of your first pet to whom you have so many fond memories attached. Oreo gave me hope in life and turned my frown into a smile every time I wasn’t feeling good. Just being next to him would make me a happier person and only release good hormones in my body. They’re the best therapy anyone could ever get,” she added.
Cases of severe depression
Dr Naveen Jayaram, psychiatrist at Sakra Hospital reports grieving pet owners approaching him for medical assistance as a common occurrence. He has encountered over 10 such cases in the last month. “The grief that someone goes through when they lose a pet is the same as when a near and dear one passes on. They go through the same steps of grieving. I have dealt with a number of cases where pet owners have gone into severe depression after losing a pet. It all depends on their levels of attachment with their pets.”
A recent instance he points to is one where a pet owner went into depression after her cat fell off from the 11th floor and died. Since it was sudden it impacted her in a bad way. She had to be given months of therapy before she stopped blaming herself for what had happened. Again, the impact is also based on the predictability of the event. To develop the same attachment with the new pet would take time. There will be a certain time an individual will take to form the same relationship with their new pet, he adds.
The worst Christmas for Rohan Zachariah, a mathematics student, was when he lost his dog, Carbon, to old age. To him, Carbon was more than just a pet. And when he wasn’t able to handle the situation, Rohan went in for counselling. “I was fifteen and my dog was eight when I lost him. He was my companion. I literally grew up with him and shared a lot of memories with him. His death just broke me. I just didn’t know how to process all that information,” he says.
Dr Vijay Mehtry, consultant psychiatrist at Manasa Neuropsychiatric Hospital, encounters grieving pet owners every once in a while. “Pet owners go through a lot of emotional stress on the loss of a pet and the grief they face can escalate to other problems like depression and PTSD.”