An honest conversation over nothing but cake and coffee. No alcohol to help spill your beans, and no whipping out your smartphones every five minutes.
This is what is on offer at ‘Honest Conversations Over Coffee,’ a Delhi-based mental health and wellness initiative which aims to encourage ‘real conversations’ between people from all backgrounds and across all age groups.
Since their first session in July, which had a gathering of 13 odd participants, ‘Honest Conversations Over Coffee’ has grown.
Each person at these sessions gets five to ten minutes with every other person attending the session. You have the liberty of speaking about just any topic - your first love, Nietzsche, the latest Bollywood movie or, well, pizza.
But there are a few simple rules to be followed: No technology, no small talk, no judgements, labels or legacy.
“Our lifestyle has changed drastically over the past five years. We talk, but avoid speaking about what really matters to us. We converse in headlines, focusing only on the events,” says Saurabh Parmar, the founder of ‘Honest Conversations Over Coffee.’
Saurabh was struggling with his own health when he realised that reaching out is never as easy as it sounds. He realized that we often find it easier to open up to strangers, whether it’s a therapist, a tinder match or an internet friend. This is why we need spaces for people to converse freely without having the fear of being judged, he insists.
“Our mind requires care just like our body. Do we really have to wait till we are unwell to start taking care of our mental health? Honest Conversations Over Coffee could help with managing our mental dialogue better,” adds Saurabh.
Such initiatives that aim to improve mental well-being are indeed of great importance today. Living as part of a world, which is primarily driven by technology, we wake up to alarms and good morning texts and rush through our 9 to 5 jobs before spending the rest of our “leisure” time crouched over flashing screens of various sizes.
We hardly find the time to speak to the people around us.
“We relentlessly pursue money and fame. We are addicted to our smartphones and social media and are great at putting filters on things; till we deceive ourselves to the point of complete burnout,” says Saikat Pyne, a PR professional.
Saikat battled depression and had to undergo therapy for several months. As someone who has been attending ‘Honest Conversations Over Coffee’ sessions, he feels that meeting people and speaking up helps a great deal, although it cannot replace getting professional help. Taking up hobbies and outdoor activities like trekking also helped Saikat overcome depression.
“Conversation will help in destigmatisation, and that is a great start when it comes to mental health awareness,” says Atika Shukla, a counselling psychologist. “We are social beings, and the increasing lack of interaction has resulted in our failure to cope with difficult situations due to the lack of a support system,” she adds.
Doctors also say that we should also keep in mind the fact that physical and mental health go hand in hand. Therapy must be followed up with healthy lifestyle changes in order to stay mentally well.
‘Honest Conversations Over Coffee’ is planning to expand to other cities as well, starting with Bengaluru and Mumbai. "Being a community-driven initiative, chapters have to be set up by people in different places," says Saurabh.
For now, they plan on bringing in therapists and taking the ‘no technology’ rule further, by holding sessions outdoors, on farms and other such natural spaces.
In the meantime, how about turning off this bright screen and going out for a cup of coffee?