According to traditional Indian culture, everything is the girl’s fault. From rape to widowhood to giving birth only to daughters, it all boils down to the woman. Take eve-teasing. It’s down to her way of talking, walking, dressing... If she can’t handle male attention—stalking, acid attacks, some groping-shoping—she must always be in female company, out only during mid-day when natural light is at its best, and attired head to toe. If not, men have to get all protective and teach her a lesson. ‘Mea culpa’ is the Indian woman’s default setting.
If desi lads married their rape victims or gave a discount on the dowry rate or kept their second wives out of their first wives’ hair, they were already doing their bit for society, okay? So some lass wants to study, another wants to work, hmmm, the elders will discuss this in their baritones and let you know. But staying out after dark saying ‘cheers’ with men neither brother nor husband? So not sanskaari.
Sexual harassment happens at too many levels all over the place with no strata of society exempt from it. Most women have been touched inappropriately at some time or the other. Sometimes by strangers, but mostly by people known to them. It is a scary thing, if you have a daughter, to let her out into the world, into the road, into a party. Just when mothers were starting to think they were being hyper, a fatal rape in bus happens or molestations bang in the middle of a hectic street on New Year’s eve. If this is how big cities treat their womenfolk, then what hope is there for blind alleys of backward villages?
And even if no one says this out aloud, it is there on the tip of some tongues, the words, ‘for God’s sake, woman, dress decently!’ Just for one minute let’s take it seriously, this accusation of not covering up. Wardrobe malfunctions, tights, leggings, high-slit kurtas, hot pants, bra strap or panty line showing, the material shrank in wash or a dress two sizes small... It may be faux westernisation or baring in the name of modernisation, why take the slightest show of skin so personally? Nothing is punishable by rape—not a mini skirt, not being cross-eyed drunk, not being out late. And what guarantee is there that a woman won’t be mauled for showing her toe or nose or elbow? Erogenous zones are subject to change. Plus, male threshold levels are well-kept secrets and perhaps not legal.
If immodesty was all that triggered sex crimes, how come the beaches where foreigners sunbathe or swim in teeny bikinis are exempted from this hooliganism? Those who paw are well aware of when and where to paw. They are circumspect and bide their time. It has to be a bustling place. Cops should either be absent, outnumbered or looking the other way. Women must be caught with their guard down. These are mob sports, banking on team spirit. Anonymity is key.
A fact that emerges from the latest harassment reports is that women are not covering up anymore. Not verbally.
(Antony is a short-story writer)