At a recent wedding, there was a serpentine queue waiting to greet the bride and groom. I joined the tail of the line. I recalled weddings of yore during my boyhood, which were celebrated in a homely manner.
An aunt’s daughter’s wedding in a village in Kerala is etched in my memory. We went a few days in advance, because my mother wanted to assist the aunt in preparing sweets and savouries for the wedding. The marriage was conducted in the aunt’s house itself, since mandaps were non-existent in those days in that region.
The house had a sprawling backyard with a well and a cowshed. A bathroom and lavatory were at the far end of the backyard. Since my aunt stopped rearing cattle due to lack of grazing grounds, the cowshed was used to store firewood. The shed became the makeshift kitchen for the wedding. Many neighbours considered it as their own wedding and came forward to assist my aunt. Ladies helped my aunt in preparing murukku, laddu, mysurpa, jangiri, etc. A neighbour’s house was partially vacated and earmarked for the stay of the groom’s party.
A pandal was erected in front of the house with an embellished canopy. Nobody objected to the pandal on the street, because most people walked or travelled by rickshaw. Even the groom’s party arrived from the bus-stand by rickshaws. After a traditional aarti, they were accommodated in the neighbour’s house.
As the food was prepared by expert cooks of the village in the cowshed, some young cousins tasted them first, claiming they were ensuring that the items were tasty enough to be served to the groom’s folks. Food was served generously and second helpings were not frowned upon.
There were some quarrelsome relatives in the groom’s family who were itching for a squabble if the coffee or any delicacy was not up to the mark. There was an uncle on the bride’s side who was willing to bend his back to solve any hitch during the wedding. If anything was not liked by the sambandhi, he would apologise and serve another tumbler of freshly brewed decoction or another serving of payasam.
If the priest wanted more cowdung cakes or flowers, he would cycle to the bazaar and bring them in a jiffy. There was no reception those days. Only nalangu in the evening after the marriage served as entertainment for all family members. When we returned home after the wedding, we carried happy memories and packets of sweets and savouries which lasted for a week.
P Subramanian
Email: mailpsubramanian@gmail.com