From the toothless HR to the apathetic TV viewer, we’re all part of the problem

Sexual Harassment is now the mother of all topics. Its a good thing and not so good.

Sexual Harassment is now the mother of all topics. Its a good thing and not so good. By never letting it get out of our minds, we are building a deeper understand of consent and coercion, both mentally and bodily, and are even peeling away the layers that lie beneath the stark blacks and whites of what constitutes harassment and not.

The bad thing about all this talk of harassment and the countless opinion pieces is the obvious: there’s too much noise making it tedious to sieve through to the core of the issue, and most points of view are being shared within a suctioned echo chamber. In the large world that remains oblivious to this ongoing discourse, and in the lives that have yet to come to a standstill because of the Ansari allegation, I wonder if much is changing.

When The list made the headlines, two warring groups were formed — those who saw the need for naming and shaming, and those that stressed on due systems and processes. I saw the list as means for those had been violated to come out anonymously, simply because the systems were not strengthened enough to protect their identity. While on the subject of identity, here’s a bunch of reasons why women wouldn’t want theirs revealed:

• They will be celebrated as victims or survivors
• They will be expected to be spokespersons in the wake of harassment incidents even if it is traumatic for them
• They will be asked to repeatedly relate the harrowing account thereby reliving it numerous times
• They will be judged on the basis of their past
• They will be asked where they were, why, whether they were intoxicated, and what they were wearing
• They will be at the receiving end of the “maybe she asked for it!” comment
• They could be worried about their careers
• They will be labelled troublesome and difficult to work with
• They will be accused of not having a sense of humour
• They will be told that it is common and therefore not to make a fuss
• Their experience could be dismissed as it does not qualify as serious enough
• They will be asked if their feeble no actually meant yes
• They will become the subject of television debates till it tires everyone out and more TRP increasing news occurs.
• That after all of this she may not get justice
• They may not even be believed because of who they are accusing of harassment.

Setting systems and processes in place will not make the above reasons go away or make it easier for the person who has been harassed to come out in the open because we are all a part of the problem — the HR person who is quick to brand the person but will ‘banish’ the perpetuator to another department, the TV viewer that tsk tsk on knowing that the victim was drunk or wearing a mini-skirt, and all of us who need the details in order to not disbelieve the person.

We are the society that conveniently separates the art from the artist, fussing over the masterpiece and forgetting the accusations on the artists. We are the people who will continue to quote the academic and laude his body of work while quietly pushing away the act that violated a persons body. And we are those that will live in denial about our stars and celebrities as people dare to speak up against them.

As those of us who have to think about what justice means to an affected person and ways in which it can be delivered, we need to first promise to hear the story, believe it, join in the demand for retribution, and see through the redessal before we ask how long it will take to open up our own can of worms. #metoo and #timesup will arrive here soon. The question is if we are ready.

Archanaa Seker

seker.archanaa@gmail.com

The writer is a city-based activist, in-your-face feminist and a media glutton