All about life, death and hand moisturisers  

As you all already know by now, when the time comes to read my will, the real winners will be 1) those who match an NC40-42 and 2) everybody who loves a good hand cream

CHENNAI : As you all already know by now, when the time comes to read my will, the real winners will be 1) those who match an NC40-42 and 2) everybody who loves a good hand cream. My bathroom cabinet stands testament to this — which sadly, fell off last week from having too many products stored on it. I repeat — these will be made available on a first-come, first-serve basis at my bathroom door upon 
my passing.

I like my hand creams nice and greasy — ultra rich and buttery, quite like an average American’s diet. I’m a big believer in getting max moisture, which is impossible without inconveniencing yourself with a little extra grease. Keeping this in mind, you must wait at least 2.5 minutes post applying cream before you handle a kitten.

For starters, I am a forever fan of the O’Keeffe’s Healthy Feet Foot cream, which does exactly what it says. Oh, the horror! Run and tell the people that I use foot cream on my hands. But I’m sold! It’s great for parched hands and cracked heels alike, and I will love it forever, even if it does trade me in for newer, younger feet.

Aesop’s Resurrection Aromatique Hand Balm is probably the fanciest of this lot, and it is beyond worth it. You don’t need to reapply it constantly, it’s moisturising, and one application in the morning has me soft and happy till lunch. It has almost feral softness to it, and reminds me of petting a blooming field of sun-kissed wild flowers. (Yes, I think I’m saying that smelling this cream sends me in a hallucinatory state.)
Next up, EOS! These little beauties are SO convenient to carry in your bag — you don’t need to unscrew a cap, and set it down only to lose it later. No tube to accidentally pop open in your bag and squirt everywhere. Think of this as a gateway cream for those of you who aren’t quite ready to make the plunge as yet.

I hate to break it to you, but unless you want to end up with old, haggard lady hands, devote yourself to sunscreen. And you know what SuperGoop Forever Young hand cream with sea buckhorn has that virtually ALL hand creams on this planet lack? SUNSCREEN. I don’t know what sea buckhorn is or even does, but this is a very special buckhorn hand cream that sounds only partially painful. I was strongly considering wearing gloves while driving for a while, but decided against it as I, alas don’t live my life like a Leo Tolstoy novel.

Keep your hands from looking like shrivelled mangoes that have been kept out in the sun for too long, and use your creams. I have shown you the way, the light and the truth. And so ends my curious little conversation about life, death and moisturising.

Related Stories

No stories found.
The New Indian Express
www.newindianexpress.com