Help. Some ruffians are banging on our door and I’m afraid they will break in. Please send someone urgently.”
“Bhaiya, aap kaun se accent mein bol rahein hain? Hamare paas sab hain; aap apnawala identify kardein toh hum uss accent-wale policewale ko phone pass kar denge.”
This may not have happened yet. But it could.
Once, the universal translator existed only in the realm of science fiction. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy had the Babel fish. It looked like a leech which, when stuck inside the ear, could instantly understand any language in the galaxy. In Star Trek, it looked like a microphone and could translate all languages, including that of alien species without access to any Earth tongue. Soon, the Delhi Police will have officers standing by, prepped to speak and understand English in all accents.
It’s not about Atithi Devo Bhava, though the initiative could also work for tourism. Alarmed by the increasing attacks on foreigners, especially Africans, most of whom it can’t understand, the force has roped in language experts who will train the staff in “speaking and understanding English in different accents”. Some of the trained staff will be posted in the New Delhi district control room to take calls on the “helpline for foreigners”. The other fluent talkers in foreign-accented English will be deployed round-the-clock in the central police control room, which is said to get 20,000 calls a day on the 100 number.
The idea was born after a meeting between aggrieved foreigners and the cops, where the former complained that the police didn’t understand them when they called for help. Apparently, the accent came in the way, even when both parties were speaking English, or their variant of it.
It happens. With English being spoken worldwide by 850 million, of which 505 million are not native speakers, it’s not surprising that pronunciations vary radically across regions. There is considerable variation within accents across England itself, just like there is between North and South India. (I remember once watching a news channel helpfully providing sub-titles in English when the late Andhra chief minister NT Rama Rao was speaking—in English.)
Imagine the situation then in Africa, which is the world’s most multi-lingual continent. Over 3,000 languages are spoken there, most of African origin, some of European or Asian. Imagine how this affects the English spoken by people from that continent.
Getting a dialect coach to learn an accent is par for the course in Hollywood. Hours of practice, and lip and tongue drills go into the coaching. That’s how Matt Damon learnt to speak South African in Invictus, and Gerard Butler, who is Scottish, made like a New Yorker in The Bounty. Wonder who our boys in khaki will sound like. A Hugh Jackman, or even Hugh Grant, would be nice.
shampa@newindianexpress.com