Travel test

It starts with the most basic of questions of where one wants to go and when.
Travel test

BENGALURU: Planning and going on a holiday together is surely one of the most significant tests of compatibility in a relationship. This holds true for people testing out whether they could be in a sustainable long-term relationship, and even for people who have lived with each other for years. Travelling out can be quite the test.

It starts with the most basic of questions of where one wants to go and when. One might want multiple short breaks close to their place of residence while another would want extended periods of stay in far away places, soaking in the atmosphere and culture of those spaces. 

One might prefer flying to the destination and maximising the time spent there while the other wants long road trips with as many stops along the way as possible. There may be differences in where one wants to stay – do you choose quaint bed and breakfast places, or resorts that are destinations in themselves that ask for tens of thousands of rupees a night, or basic accommodation that costs a couple of hundred rupees a night? What meals would each want? What excites each – spirituality, ancient buildings, nature, people, culture, Ayurvedic or other healing spaces, or just a place where someone else is doing all the cooking and cleaning?

People vary so much in their individual rhythms as well. Everyone’s biological rhythms become pretty individualised over time. In one’s teens and twenties, it might be a lot more flexible, but as one gets older, preferences start asserting themselves in terms of even things like what kind of bedding one can use, whether one needs air conditioning or ceiling fans, what one’s preferred mealtimes are and dietary preferences or choices. Some want to have their sightseeing done early, others want to take their time to laze and catch a sight or two, yet others want to do everything. 

Finding partners who you gel with can seem like a herculean task. Travelling alone might even seem so much better, and yet, when one gets the right partner for the job, it feels like magic. The experience is smooth and things seem to take on an extra sheen. It feels like a perfectly synchronised dance. 

Sometimes, we are lucky in that our travelling partners are also the ones we live with and love, but at other times, it may not be the case. Maybe we enjoy some things together but not others. It doesn’t have to mean that there can’t be a relationship there. 

Maybe each might need to go away by themselves or with others every now and then, and if that’s the case, what really matters is if there’s enough interest in each other’s journeys. It isn’t just about being compatible in specific holidays together, but about being interested and genuinely curious about each other’s ways, taking pleasure in the differences as much as in the joint experiences. Now, that is a much harder test than just finding ways to travel together – that is truly precious.

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