BENGALURU: The earth made another revolution around the sun, and I attended another New Year’s party. Come December, young Indians are troubled by a singular question - ‘What are you doing for New Year’s this year?’
There are but two options in front of you. Firstly, you have the parties thrown by hotels and pubs. They are all named similarly - “New Years’ Unlimited Ganga-Jamuna Dhamaka Offer” party. Where you pay a hefty cover charge to attend what seems like the Kauravas’ Convocation ceremony. Hundreds of drunk guys dancing and hugging each other under the watchful hawk-like eyes of bouncers, whose new year resolution appears to be to kick as many people out of the club as possible.
Then there are the house parties. The ones where you save on cover charges by visiting friends. These are friends spread across the bandwidth of friendships - from recent colleagues to childhood buddies. Where you carry your own booze, but keep an eye on others’ drinks as well. These parties usually begin on a strong note, but quickly descend into an echo chamber of ‘Can you play my song next?’. And when the clock strikes 12, everybody participates in a countdown with such vigour, you’d assume they were personally involved in moving the earth around the sun. And then, when the chaos has settled, and those with young children have left for their homes, the cursed question innocuously sneaks into the party - ‘What are your resolutions for this year?’
Every year, billions of people around the world torment themselves over resolutions and targets. Self-imposed ‘Bhishma Pratigyas’ around fitness, discipline, and financial stability. New year resolutions are easily the worst part of new year celebrations. Every time a person makes a New Year’s resolution, a gym owner smiles and books his next car. But how did we reach here? As human beings, the apex species that successfully wipe out flora and fauna from the face of the planet - why did we shackle ourselves with resolutions? Why do we get so emotional about the earth making a circle around the sun? It has been doing so for 4.5 billion years. Dinosaurs never got emotional about a new year. They quietly went about their work - roaring, hunting, and scaring Hollywood kids inside parks. Dogs go to sleep on new years and continue to chase cars through the nights. Cats, birds, and fish do not torment themselves over unrealistic resolutions. Then why did we humans get so attached to the idea of resolutions?
When Galileo Galilei firmly propagated that the earth moved around the sun, the Church sentenced him to house arrest for the rest of his life. Imagine his disappointment if he learnt that millions of humans mark his discovery with a promise to eat fewer momos in the coming year! The concept of New Year’s Day is based on the Gregorian calendar, whereas our ancestors followed the lunar calendar. For thousands of years, we used the moon to mark our days, and compared it to the face of our lover. The solar calendar - with its new years parties and leap years - was forced upon us. Why do we set ourselves up for failure and self-doubt every year?
My New Year’s resolution has remained the same every year - I shall not murder anybody this year. There are moments where I come close to breaking my resolution. And yet, with discipline and determination, I successfully complete my resolution every year. The trick really, is to set extremely low expectations of oneself, and sail through the year with the confidence of a person who nails their New Year resolutions every year. Happy New Year!
(The writer’s views are his own)