BENGALURU: City of Joy they call it! City of corruption, low moral-standards, misogyny and kathi rolls! Do you think I am being harsh and insensitive to a city that nurtured the likes of Rabindranath Tagore and Subhash Chandra Bose?
A few years ago I roundly cursed a city up north which was the epicentre of a horrific rape that shook us to the very core of our beings. We will consistently hold candle-light marches while ‘our-powers-to-be’ slide it under the carpet either because one of their own was implicated or because it shows up the glaring lacunas in our law and order situation.
Whatever it is, it is just a mere woman problem. Women will yell, scream and tear at their hair while patriarchal men will contribute their two pennies worth by saying, “We are bringing up our boys all wrong’’. That too is the ‘mothers’ responsibility. Never mind even if we are coerced into take amino-synthesis tests and forced to abort our female foetuses…ultimately the buck stops here, with the women. It’s always the way we dress, move, talk or behave that gets us into trouble.
Some man somewhere wants us to toe the line and teach us who’s ‘boss’. Rape has nothing to do with sexual gratification; it has everything to do with power! The rapists don’t gratify themselves and leave. They always mutilate, stab, break our pelvic girdle, and pull our intestines out. Why? Because they can, and sadly, get away with it.
There are outrages against women the world over. I remember once participating in a survey which asked a pertinent question; which country or city do you find is the safest for women. My answer was a no-brainer. None! In my opinion the means doesn’t justify the end. The legal prosecution and ultimate persecution of the accused are almost 0.002 per cent.
Often societal pressure and pressure from the family doesn’t allow the victim to complain as the whole process is extremely humiliating and distressing for the victim. Court proceedings are long and voyeuristic and often the victim withdraws the complaint. Very rarely is there redressal and the whole process takes a terrible mental, physical and monetary toll on the victims’ families.
But what I ask is when we know somebody is a predator and even though he hasn’t been prosecuted but the hapless victims have complained, he is still allowed to roam free and unhampered amongst us because he has the right connections and the right amount of money to flash around in ‘decent’ circles. How many of us have the courage to confront or black-ball him? His story is flashed for everyone to see yet they give him the benefit of the doubt, as he flashes his mucilaginous smile while he is welcomed amongst ‘decent’ society? Are we all not compliant to his heinous crimes?
I was laid up with the worst flu ever and such dour thoughts didn’t make me feel better. So when I was invited to celebrate at good pal Riyaaz Amlani’s resto-pub, ‘Social’ in Koramangala I went. Chef Saurabh Arora pulled out all the old favourite treats for their tenth anniversary and it was wonderful to sit in the comfort of the sprawling restaurant, listening to rock-music and delving into the world’s tastiest burger and sesame prawn-toasts.
Seethe and smile. That’s life!
(The writer’s views are personal)