Speak out on child sexual abuse as culture of silence puts kids at risk

On World Day for Prevention of Child Sexual Abuse, experts ask educators and parents to actively engage in the talk about sex and sexuality
Image for representational purpose only. ( Express Illustration)
Image for representational purpose only. ( Express Illustration)

According to the latest National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) report, published last month, in 2017, 32,608 cases were reported under the Protection of Children from Sexual Offences Act of 2012. However, experts say that this is just the tip of the iceberg. While there remains a great deal of fear and panic regarding Child Sexual Abuse (CSA), there is also a culture of silence around it which makes reporting harder. Worse — few parents, guardians or educators are willing to engage in efforts to actively prevent CSA, including teaching children about sexuality, their body and personal safety.

Break the silence

“I think our conspiracy of silence as a culture, in terms of talking about anything to do with sex and sexuality, needs conscious transformation,” observes Dr Eesha Sharma, assistant professor, Dept of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, NIMHANS, Bengaluru. Sharma emphasises the need for sex education programmes to cover sexuality and not just sex.

In India, sexual and reproductive issues are treated purely from a moralistic perspective rather than from a perspective of health rights, she notes. Such attitudes put children at risk. “Knowing that sex is a big taboo in our culture, abusers target those children whose parents won’t take any action even if they found out,” says sexuality educator Niyatii Shah.

Educate parents

Sandhiyan Thilagavathy, founder of Aware that spreads awareness on CSA, says, unfortunately, parents are uncomfortable being educated on the issue. The NGO went all out to create awareness workshops to educate and empower teachers as well as parents within school premises, who could then, sensitise their children.The team struggled with parents being “too busy” to take out time and schools that had tight academic deadlines to meet.

“Parents are paranoid while talking about this topic, which is why the awareness won’t even reach the children,” says Sandhiyan, explaining that parents try to avoid attending awareness workshops on the subject. However, as Chennai Public School Principal Asha Nathan points out, “Prevention is better than cure.” CPS includes information about CSA in their regulated personality development classes with age-appropriate content right from class 1.

“Keeping these topics away from children as taboo is not right. They need to be given the exposure and be made to understand that they are vulnerable and may be subjected to this kind of victimisation. Restraint on behalf of the parents in handling CSA hinders any attempts to solve the problem. Awareness programmes should be extensively carried out in all schools,” she adds.

See the signs

Lack of awareness allows parents to believe myths such as ‘stranger danger’ and ignore harm from closer quarters as an abuser could be a parent, step-parent, uncle, aunt, sibling, tutor, family friend, neighbour or somebody who just has occasional access to the child.“There are 90 per cent chances of the abuser being known to the child and the family but the family may not even see the warning signs,” says Nancy Thomas, co-founder, Tulir, Centre for the Prevention and Healing of Child Sexual Abuse, Chennai. There is a pattern of behaviour which could indicate that a person has a sexual interest in a child, she says.

Dr Sharma explains that abusers ‘groom’ children to facilitate abuse. “In a majority of child victims, especially where the perpetrator is a known person, we come across a process of grooming. Perpetrators engage children through various means... This may involve giving the child material or social rewards or even using threats to keep the child from talking about the abuse to anyone. In slightly older children, the perpetrator may manipulate the child into believing how he/she is actually part of the abuse and disclosing it to anyone would invite trouble for both the perpetrator and the child,” she says. Dr Sharma points out that CSA is rarely a one-time event.

This makes it imperative for parents, teachers and guardians to educate themselves. As CSA survivor and ‘steward’ of RiseAndShineMovement.org Carolyn Byers Ruch puts it: “Sexual abuse is never a child’s fault. And prevention is always an adult’s responsibility.”

Signs a child may have been abused

 Difficulty in walking or sitting
 Mood swings,  Feeling ‘dirty’
 Self-injurious behaviour, like alcohol or drug abuse, body-mutilation
 Age-inappropriate sexual behaviour
 Evidence of physical trauma to the oral, genital or anal areas
 Developing new fears, phobias
 Wearing of provocative clothing, or layers of clothes to hide injuries and/or to appear unattractive

When a child discloses sexual abuse, Niyatii Shah suggests

 Keep calm

 Believe the child

 Respect the child’s privacy by not telling other people

 Get professional help

 Don’t blame the child

Report it

According to the POCSO Act, anybody who has apprehension or knowledge that sexual abuse is likely to be committed or has been committed, is required to report it. (The POCSO Act is available at https://wcd.nic.in)

Children or adults can report sexual abuse on
 Childline’s 1098, the country’s toll-free helpline for children.
 www.ncpcr.gov.in by clicking on the POCSO E-BOX and selecting a picture that depicts the form of abuse.

For more information on CSA visit: https://www.tulir.org/

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