HYDERABAD: When I decided, to be with the times, and write about resolutions, I started my search for information on Google. Well here’s the story. Apparently, 4,000 years ago, the Babylonians who celebrated the new year in March, would make promises to the gods for the new year. And since then this concept of a resolution for a new year evolved. Did I just say evolved? oops sorry... no evolving happened there, and nothing has really changed for us humans.
Over time, the pressure to make resolutions, and the guilt of not following them, has transcended culture and geographic distribution.
Children, adults, and the elderly alike, make and break resolutions. The article I was reading went on to state that less than 25% of people stick to their resolutions till the end of January. As many as 48% of people drop out in the first week and less than 8% of people actually follow through with their resolutions. All the rest, drop out somewhere in between this new year and the next.
Now given this rather discouraging statistic, the next discussion would be on why we make resolutions, only to break them, time and again, year after year?
‘I want to lose 15 kilogrammes of weight.’ Yes! Achievable... then, there comes the catch.’ I want to lose 15 kilos in 30 days!’ Not just difficult, but also unattainable. Then starts the process of unhealthy diets, starvation, food fads, unhealthy lifestyles and prohibitive amounts of exercise. And then one gets so tired... that one breaks the resolution and spends the rest of January, and a good part of the year feeling anxious, sheepish, guilty, miserable and despising oneself for failing. If this person had said ‘I want to lose 15 kilogrammes in six months’, it would have probably unfolded a journey of discipline, realistic expectations, and some level of success.
So I ask you to think... are resolutions more about attaining difficult goals or about a healthy journey and attitude towards a process of gentle change?
So how must our resolutions be in order to avoid giving them up?
I don’t claim any great success in my own resolutions, I have failed too at times, many times in fact, but here is some things that worked for me and I hope they make sense to you too.
And for all those of us who did not achieve our resolutions well, there’s always next year.
(The author is a mental health professional and psychotherapist at Dhrithi Wellness Clinic)