HYDERABAD: They pamper us. They make the most delicious dishes and give us the biggest hugs. When parents reprimand us, they reprimand them. Grandparents. If there was a word synonymous with angels, this is what it would be… So, on Grandparent’s Day, CE listens as three grandparents speak about grand-parenthood and well, take a walk down memory lane.
SUDARSHAN KOKUL, 83, RETIRED MAJOR
“An agrarian family’s life in Cheriyal village (Siddipet) in the 1940s was no cakewalk. But my grandmother always brought cheer. And my, she made the most delicious butter you’d ever had,” says Sudarshan, explaining how she would use cow dung cakes and light a fire to boil milk. “It would just turn to this beautiful pinkish colour. She’d make curd, buttermilk, and of course, we kids used to stuff our faces with that butter to the point where we had white moustaches like old men and women,” he laughs.
Now sporting his very own white moustache, Sudarshan turns grandfather as he speaks of his two grandchildren, both in their teens. “My grandchildren are the lights of my life. Both their parents work so I looked after them, hearing every little chitter-chatter and helping them with their homework. Every day with them is a gift and it is so rewarding being their grandfather,” he says.
The retired major says he owes his career to his grandmother, who instilled good values in him. “The one heirloom from her that I’ve passed on to my grandchildren is her agrarian wisdom. She would always say, ‘Never waste a single grain on your plate’. Well, sometimes they listen,” he chuckles.
PADMA SUJATHA, 74, RETIRED TEACHER
“When amma would yell at me, my grandmother would rush to my defence, saying ‘Do not yell at the child’. My mother would meekly nod,” says Sujatha as she mischievously giggles. For Sujatha, summers meant a gala time with cousins at ammamma’s house.
“We would create a ruckus but ammamma had so much love to give, always pampering us. Aha…the payasam she made was so simple yet delicious. She wore such simple sarees too but carried herself with so much grace,” reminisces the little girl who suddenly remembers she is grandmother of four.
“The best moment of my life was when I saw those four bundles of joy come into this world. I can’t explain that feeling…it is something else. And now, they are so thoughtful, making sure to visit me every now and then. Oh, and I pamper them like anything but often advise them with ammamma’s words ‘All that glitters is not gold’. This is more important to remember today, “ she says.
And it seems that ammamma’s culinary skills have worked their way into Sujatha’s cooking, which often translates into lavish spreads for her foodie grandchildren. “Hyderabadi chicken biryani with mirchi ka salan and raita. And for dessert, egg pudding. I pour a lot of sugar…and love into it,” she says.
HASMUKH MEHTA, 79, RETIRED BUSINESSMAN
“My grandparents were all about tough love. But they appreciated the little things; when I was seven, I spun the lattu (bongaram) perfectly and my grandfather praised me for it. I was a hardworking student too and they valued my efforts. That was their unconditional love for me,” recalls Hasmukh. His grandmother, in particular, was a role model for him.
“What a strong-willed lady she was. When things got tough for anyone, they would always confide in her for advice. And the most lovely part about her was her kind and simple nature. Well, tough times make simple people, ” he says. But Hasmukh quips that his grandparenting style is all about making fun memories with his two granddaughters.
“When they were younger, we would play antakshari. While the older one knew a few songs, the younger one didn’t. So what the poor thing would do to not feel left out is invent her own little melodious song,” he chuckles, expressing how he feels so much unconditional love from them.
“I would sometimes teach them. Years later, I got to know that the older one didn’t like the lessons but sat there just to spend time with me. This was really heartwarming,” Hasmukh adds. “I am no disciplinarian like my grandparents but if there’s one lesson I have passed down, it is to be honest come what may,” he says.