KOCHI: Imparting sex education to children and familiarising them with sexuality is the only way to make them emotionally independent. Unfortunately, our society and educational system are very limited with its approach towards objectively grooming children on these subjects.
Swati Jagdish, an independent sex educator, and a lactation counsellor have been bashing stigma and stereotypes associated with sex education and sexuality through her Instagram handle @mayasamma. The 34-year-old creates eye-opening and fun content with her toddler Maya, and also provides workshops, and classes related to LGBTQ, menstrual cups, pregnancy health, breastfeeding, and a lot more.
How important is it to impart sex education at a very young age?
Sex education encompasses different topics including, body, consent, safety, puberty, LGBTQIA+, teenage pregnancy prevention, sexual abuse and pornography. Kids are curious by nature. As a parent, instead of waiting for your kid to shoot questions, you can initiate small discussions with them. To start with, parents can begin conversations regarding body parts. Then, it will be easier for them to talk about private parts and related topics. Research has proven that children who are open about their sexuality and sex organs are safer from sexual abuse. If you let kids explore on their own, you are giving the child’s sexual health into their own hands and it is not fair!
At what age should children be initiated to sex education?
Age-appropriate sex education can be imparted at any age. There’s no harm in starting with the basics. If parents themselves aren’t aware of comprehensive sexual health education, how can they determine that only at a particular age we are supposed to talk about sex, periods or same-sex relations? Sex education is not just about sex, LGBTQ alone. It is addressing a child’s curiosity as and when it arises, thereby preventing them from learning it from someone else or pornography.
What are the factors to consider while discussing these topics with children?
Firstly, parents have to be aware of their sexual health for them to guide their kids. In my sex education classes, I see a lot of women who are unaware of the masturbation process. Parents must be aware of such concepts to prevent them from judging or shaming their child. It is of utmost importance for parents to read, research, attend workshops, follow sex educators on social media, and clear out the misconceptions they have about sex and sexuality.
In India, schools don’t provide sex education. How do you see this?
One has to put an end to the concept that sex education is related to biology. By doing that, we are restricting sex education to just reproduction. It influences emotions, friendship, morality, relationships, and a lot more. It is crucial to makes kids aware of menstruation, puberty in boys — a topic that is hardly ever discussed — before the age of 10. Knowledge can avoid bias, stereotypes, prejudices and gender violence to a great extent.
How do you communicate with your own child Maya? What could be a good resource for our readers?
Instead of just focusing on school education, marks and classes, it is important to discuss their bodies too. If you look carefully, certain Disney movies have portrayed homosexual characters, if your kid comes up with questions, and even if they don’t, start a random conversation about romantic relationships between two men or two women. Instead of shushing them, you can play along with their curiosity.
Have you spoken to Maya about addressing the difference in opinion while interacting with children who are from families who nurture a different kind of belief system?
As a society, we have underestimated our kids a lot. They are good observers. My six-year-old Maya is aware of the fact that not all family operates like hers, and we have also done our part by making her understand that all kids are brought up differently, so initiating such conversations can lead to discomfort among them.
Are you concerned that Maya would be misjudged and looked at differently by society?
I have never had such concerns. Apart from sex education I impart self-esteem to her and make her realize that she doesn’t need anyone else’s acceptance to feel validated. I make her understand that she is worthy of love, respect just the way she is. As parents, we are one hundred per cent accepting of her and that is more than enough.
Why do you think parents hesitate to impart sex education to their child?
Simply because they have never received any and may not have seen open-minded families. This is exactly what I want to break.