During IPL season, while my cricket-enthusiast husband focuses on the matches, I find myself analysing the advertisements. A recent one that caught my attention showed a woman fearfully entering a swimming pool with inflatable supports, juxtaposed against a man confidently diving from heights. This investment ad proclaimed they had options for both risk-takers and the cautious. Perhaps the ad bothered me because it reflects a truth many women, particularly older ones, face daily: warnings from the omnipresent ‘Be Careful Brigade.’ These well-meaning individuals dispense unsolicited warnings whenever anyone attempts something unusual.
At 53, when I decided to become a runner, the brigade swung into action. ‘Your knees will suffer.’ ‘Running at your age?’ ‘Falls take longer to heal.’ Ignoring these, I completed the Dubai Marathon, setting a personal record. What surprised me was the response. Many reached out confessing they harboured similar ambitions but were constrained by family members urging them to ‘be careful.’ My story had shown them possibilities beyond these limitations.
This phenomenon extends to all spheres of life. When I planned to report a builder for creating a health hazard with sewage-filled excavation near my home, vague ‘be careful’ warnings followed: ‘Think before you complain.’ What precisely should I fear? A builder’s retaliation? Legal complications? It was merely reflexive fear mongering.
India seems particularly prone to labelling people as ‘old’ once they enter their 50s. This mindset leads many to resign themselves to declining health, viewing conditions like hypertension and diabetes as unavoidable rather than manageable. Consequently, they grow more dependent on others. When poor health is accepted as inevitable, worry-fuelled caution becomes the default response.
The ‘Be Careful Brigade’ flourishes in environments where fear overshadows possibility and where precaution displaces curiosity. Their warnings—rarely based on specific risks—serve primarily to reinforce conventional boundaries.
At any age, but particularly in our later years when time feels increasingly precious, we must evaluate whether our decisions stem from legitimate prudence or inherited fear. Sometimes, the best thing we can do for ourselves is to ignore those telling us to be careful. The 2023 Malayalam movie Falimy beautifully depicts this. A grandfather’s fervent desire is to visit Kashi. When his family insists he can’t go alone, he boldly runs away to fulfil his dream, breaking societal barriers.
Next time the ‘Be Careful Brigade’ tries to hold you back, pause and ask yourself: What exact risk am I avoiding? Is that risk truly worse than the regret of never trying?
Living cautiously might prevent some injuries, embarrassments, or conflicts. But it also guarantees the pain of unrealised potential and unexplored passions. Take sensible precautions, but live life on your own terms—not by the warnings others impose. Each ‘be careful’ we internalise becomes another barrier between ourselves and our most vibrant existence.