In the higher secondary school where I studied way back in the fifties, its headmaster, a confirmed bachelor, taught us science. The medium of instruction was Tamil. Sulphuric acid was called gandhagi gajam. Copper sulphate, mayil thutham, botanical ‘maiden-hair-fern’ was kannip penn roma bharani. At the mention of kannip penn, backbenchers Jagan and Dilli tittered, and were walloped by the HM, with his cane that had a thick silver band at the non-business end.
To showcase his position of eminence, the HM wore a biscuit-coloured three-piece suit. That suited his sandalwood complexion, toothbrush moustache and bullet-shaped head. A fringe of sparse grey hair at the back completed the ensemble. A punctuality buff, he appeared at the school 15 minutes before the first bell, which he himself rang, if the peon was not at his post. It was his practice to take his science class in the lab, amidst pipettes, burettes and ah! the skeleton.
The skeletal frame of that person was suspended inside a tall glass-cased cupboard, facilitating darshan by the students. For some odd reason, it was locked. Perhaps the school feared it will creakily walk away. Ours was a co-education school. The girls, who sat in the front benches in other classrooms, chose the farthest end, so the grinning skeleton will be as far away as possible. The back bench duo made eerie noises when the HM opened the cupboard to plonk the skeleton by his side. While the HM wore more clothes than necessary, his companion didn’t even have the God-given skin clothing.
There were several stories that circulated on the mystery of who the skeleton was before he (or was it a she?) was de-skinned. He was supposedly Paramu, the cook-cum-butler-gardener, in short the major-domo of the HM. It was said that a wily lady by the name of Kanaka wanted to marry the middle-aged HM for gain, but he spurned her proposals and in a fit of rage, slapped her when she persisted. That night when he was having a short walk in his garden, Kanaka’s uncle appeared with a sickle and pounced on him. Vigilant Paramu came in between the HM and sickle and took the blow. And the final bow. Instead of burying or cremating Paramu, it was believed that the HM had arranged to have him by his side, albeit in skeletal form in pseudo-mortality, without journeying from ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
J S Raghavan
Email: jsraghavan@yahoo.com