CHENNAI: Mohammed Shami: “I thought of committing suicide three times during that period due to severe stress.” PV Sindhu: “I was so desperate to win the title. I did not want people to say she lost in the final again.” Hima Das: “When I started running, I ran barefoot. But in my first Nationals, my father brought running shoes with spikes on them. It was just a normal pair of running shoes. I wrote ‘Adidas’ on the shoes with my hand.” Harbhajan Singh: “As far as I think, I do not think he (MS Dhoni) wants to play for India. I think he knew that the 2019 World Cup was the last tournament for him in India colours.”
These have just been some of the thought-provoking statements by Indian athletes over the last month. However, they haven’t been made to journalists or in autobiographies. Instead, they have expressed their feelings to fellow craftsmen and craftswomen.
Shami, who was accused of domestic violence by wife Hasin Jahan, was booked by the police. Following the complaint (he has since been cleared of all charges), the BCCI withheld his contract for a period of time.
Opening up to Rohit Sharma for the first time in an Instagram chat, the speedster was intimate when talking about it. “I thought of committing suicide three times during that period due to severe stress and personal problems.”
Is there a reason why Shami, and others, have opened up now, during a lockdown? Sports psychologist Mugdha Bavare, who advises a whole host of elite athletes, says there is a clear link. “Usually, they have no time to express themselves. With no matches or training to look forward to, they are talking about these things,” she tells this daily.
It’s not just that they are more talkative than normal, they have also opened up about subjects they have been reticent to discuss with the media. Sindhu, for instance, in a YouTube show with cricketers Jemimah Rodrigues and Smriti Mandhana, said that talk of a ‘final phobia’ for her propelled her to perform well in the Worlds final last year to the point of desperation.
“I was like ‘I have to win this match’. I was so desperate that I didn’t know what I would do [if I lost] so I just wanted to give my 100%. I didn’t want people to say ‘Silver Sindhu’.” “They feel better talking about this to people who understand them better,” says Bavare. “Athletes have never had time to connect like this before because of their schedules but with time suddenly on their hands, they are turning towards Instagram and other avenues to voice their feelings.”