Influences exerted by a peer group has often encouraged individuals to change natural attitudes, values, or behaviours in order to conform to a group’s norm. As a simple term, peer pressure is not necessarily negative connotation, but since quite some time, it has been made to imply that it influences people to do things that they may not otherwise choose to do. The recent incident of a teenager, who failed in SSLC (16 years), committing suicide because she was depressed that she could not make it to college, while her friends had moved on to the next class, proves the fact even more.
Peer pressure has been associated with socially undesirable behaviours, such as smoking, experimentation with alcohol and drug use. The word does not relate to other desirable activities like academic excellence or community service or volunteering for charity, etc.
Peer pressure is most commonly associated with youth, in part because most of them spend large amounts of time in schools and other fixed groups that they do not choose and are seen as lacking the maturity to handle pressure from friends.
Attending rave parties and ending up in jail, driving dad’s car under the influence of alcohol are few cases we have heard or read in recent times.
When City Express interacted with a few teenagers from different institutions in the city, the revelations were shocking as nine out of ten teenagers have succumbed to some kind of peer pressure or the other.
The most common attribute that teenagers adopt due to peer pressure is smoking. “When you are in a group of six and you are the only one who does not smoke, it puts a silent pressure on you. It started with just holding a cigarette and ash it. This slowly moved towards turning into a full-fledged smoker. I regret the very day,” said Saniya Gupta (name changed), a 2nd year degree student from a well known girl’s college on MG Road.
From the same college, Nikita (name changed) says, “I took to alcohol only because my friends used to insult me saying I have a conservative mindset. Hence, in no time, I turned into an addict.”
Another kind of pressure which our teens go through is the pressure to look as good and lean as your peers. “When I was a child, I lived in the US. I was a pretty fat kid and all the other kids used to make fun of me. I wanted to be skinny like everyone else so I resorted to throwing up everything I ate. Before I knew it, I was almost bulimic. Thankfully, my sister helped me get out of it and now I am very comfortable with my body,” says Shruthi Rao who is studying in a girls’ college situated in Koramangala.
Another route taken by the teens today is committing violent acts on self which is considered cool. “I was going through a rough phase in my life and my friends told me that by cutting my wrist, the pain would ease out. I did not agree initially but they pushed me to the limit where I thought it would help. I regret it now,” says Adrian Fernandez, a third year degree student.
Teens also tend to get into criminal activities like theft and stealing only to make their peers happy and develop a sense of acceptance in the group. Meenu Murali who is in 3rd year degree final said, “I did not have any friends after my dad was transferred. But then I met this group of girls and we became friends. We went to the nearby supermarket after school and I noticed they were stealing things. I told them to put the things back but they didn’t listen. They said they wouldn’t be my friend if I didn’t steal something too. I wish I didn’t do it, but I stole a candy bar.”
Today the kids are in a race to reach the maturity phase. “We are a group of seven friends and I was the only virgin in the group. My friends started making fun of me and later encouraged me to experience physical intercourse. Although I was not ready, I went ahead but later I regretted as it was a horrifying experience,” says Rehana, (name changed), a 2nd year degree student.
Voicing a similar opinion, Sudipta R said, “I tried marijuana because every weekend my whole gang of friends used to consume. At first I just wanted to try out but later became one of them.” Dr Shayam, a psychiatrist said, “Teenagers tend to form a close bond with their peers and they start identifying with their peers more than their family. This increases the desire to be approved and be accepted by them. Here comes a lot of pressure to look as cool as their peers. I have come across many cases involving peer pressure in recent times where my patients have become drug addicts. Lately, cocaine consumption has also become very popular among the teens and middle aged people.”
Is there a solution to it? Senior sociologist, Narayana Chetty feels that educational institutions and parents have to collectively play a role to motivate the children in the right direction and inculcate the habit of making the right choices depending on individual likes and dislikes and not on peers. “There is a lack of trust between the parents and teachers and the need of the hour is to build the breach for the welfare of our children.”
Peer pressure is not always bad, it can have positive impact, however, the irony is that the negative impacts are more comparatively. Remember the choice is yours even though you are tempted by your peers. Know what is right for you and assess the risks before making your friends happy. Friends are those who accept you for who you are, so stick to being you.