Do you know how you learn a language? Were you taught from a young age the nuances of the language that you today are fluent in? The answer to both these questions is probably no.
Let us delve into an important part of our communication process. Any communication between people can be divided into two parts. One is speaking and the other is listening.
Scientists have estimated that we spend roughly 60 per cent of our communication time listening, but we’re not very good at it. We retain just 25 per cent of what we hear.
Listening is an important tool. Though immense stress is laid on teaching a child to speak, no one teaches us to listen. Therefore we must first examine the reason why listening is important.
♦ Listening helps you become more productive because then you will know what your teacher or boss want from you.
♦ It helps you understand instructions better.
♦ It helps you build better rapport with others including your teachers, classmates, colleagues, clients and bosses.
♦ It helps you answer their questions well, which will show that you care about what they say. You can earn their respect.
♦ It can help resolve conflicts that you face with your fellow workers or classmates.
♦ It helps you become a better team member.
If you are still wondering why you need to listen, let me elaborate on the points I mentioned earlier.
1. Better understanding of things leads you to have better grasp on things.
2. Grasping things better makes it easier for you to evaluate them.
3. Evaluation helps you decide whether or not you will be able to perform the given task.
4. Evaluation also helps you analyse where you need to improve yourself to perform better or fulfil your duties in any assigned role.
It is easy to think of listening as a simple task which does not involve active participation. On the contrary, listening is an active process and involves more than hearing what the other person is saying. It involves paying attention to what is being said and then processing that information to gauge what further action is required.
Listening is one of the most important skills for a leader. A leader needs to know what matters to the team members and what doesn’t. A leader needs to show that he/she cares about the team. This can happen only when the leader is a good listener. Hearing things superficially will not help in any way. Listening is the only way a leader can earn trust, respect and commitment from his/her team.
Listening skills can be developed with practice. The first step is to simply pay undivided attention to the speaker. There are some physical actions called body language that can help improve your listening skills to a great extent:
1. Maintain eye contact.
2. Sit still. Fidgeting will cause you to not pay attention.
3. Do not interrupt the speaker.
4. Nod when the other person talks.
5. Take notes when required.
6. Lean a little towards the speaker.
7. Gather your thoughts on the subject and ask questions.
The Dalai Lama says, in a nutshell, says what the entire article is trying to convey.
“When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know; When you listen, you may learn something new.”
So remember my friends, talk less and listen more. Don’t just hear what people say. Listen attentively.