Good morning, Bangalore!
This last week has been devoted to doing everything natural and herbal. I am a die-hard believer in the benefits of allopathic medicine and I considered everything else as mumbo jumbo. The best way for me to zone out was to listen to people drone on about the fantastic results they have received by sticking pins and needles in their unmentionables or drinking the juice of some vile tasting vegetable or herb! To me, they were all just gullible cretins who had a herd mentality and would claim a miraculous cure even if they weren’t the direct beneficiaries of it. All this changed when I had an unrelenting pain in my wrist. I did everything, MRIs, physiotherapy, pain killers and the works. Nothing worked. A friend suggested an acupuncturist and only because I admired her courage (I nearly bit her head off!), that I relented. Worse come to worse, I could bite the acupuncturist’s head off if the pain didn’t subside! I must admit (rather shamefacedly) that the treatment did work and as of now I am pain free… hallelujah!
The reason for recounting my saga is simple. I was blown away with the patience and the kindness of both my friend and her doctor. They were both inordinately polite! With so much boorish behaviour permeating into our lives, their politeness came as a ‘rude’ shock! (Now there’s an excellent example of an oxymoron). As Indians we have little or no idea about personal space. We tend to disregard queues; we bump into each other without a by-your-leave, unabashedly eavesdrop on conversations, peer into other people’s financials and ask deeply personal questions (married? No? Why not? Children? No? Can’t have, huh?), as if it is our birthright! The level of impoliteness varies geographically in our country but, by far Bangalore still retains its ‘polite avatar’.
That having been said, it is marginally distressing to see how impolite people are on the phone or on WhatsApp. Spam callers and tele-marketers aside, the general tone with which some people invite you to various events is borderline pathetic. I am sometimes referred to as ‘Mr Rubi’ and when I answer irately (but politely) the ensuing conversation is often ludicrous! There is an immediate expectation of ‘getting publicity, and without knowing (or caring) about your credentials one is supposed to write about them on social media and many of them helpfully offer you their Instagram hashtags! Recently someone plaintively complained that since I ‘dint’(their spelling not mine) write on social media about their event where I was invited as a guest, they concluded it wasn’t ‘my thing’!
So when the ITC Gardenia sent me a very polite invitation to attend their annual supper theatre, I was elated! I was addressed by my (proper) name, dates were blocked and on responding in the affirmative, a proper invitation was sent. A wonderful evening was had with like-minded guests, impeccable food and service and where everyone felt honoured and happy. The famed Amir Raza Husain’s play had all of us rolling in the aisles and since the ambiance was perfect, so was the evening!
The next polite invitation was extended by Gypsy Neel, a boy wonder who turns every restaurant he touches into a hotspot. This time it was for a new micro-brewery he manages with a hip name like XOOX! He called to find out a convenient date and sent us (gentle) reminders. At the pub, we were treated to some spectacular Sri Lankan delicacies and some interesting brews while he was always at hand looking after all his guests, explaining the nuances of each dish and the concepts behind it. He made sure all of us had his undivided attention. Again, whether it’s a hotel chain or a standalone restaurant, the key is how you treat your guests. Viva good manners!
Till next time. Ciao!
Rubi Chakravarti
writer, actor and funny girl