CHENNAI: As one of the most common cancers in women, with one positive diagnosis in India every four minutes, breast cancer is a daunting and painful battle. This Breast Cancer Awareness Month, Naaz Ghani, KV Navya and Sowmya Mani speak to four women who fought the disease, their demons, their fears — for their happiness
P Deepa: learning to live happily
My husband had suffered from a cancerous tumour in the brain and passed away in 2005. I was only 40 years old and I had two children to take care of. At the time I never thought that I would also be diagnosed with breast cancer. A week after my husband passed away, the doctor gave me the news that they had spotted a lump on my breast during my quarterly check-up. They said that there was a possibility of recovering from it because they had spotted the cancer at an early stage. That was the lowest point in my life. I hit rock bottom and had no idea what to do. My children gave me hope. Watching my younger daughter play in our living room while our elder daughter sat on the dining table colouring, made me realise that, if not for myself, I had to live for them.
I underwent chemotherapy for four months. Eventually, the treatment made me weak and I had to ask my mother to take care of the kids. I lost some hair and oodles of weight too. My children would play between 4 pm and 6 pm, and I used to love watching them chase each other and laugh. I couldn’t help thinking, what if I hadn’t known about the lump. My children may not have had a mother today. Before my husband was diagnosed, I had no idea how to deal with cancer. I didn’t even know that a lump on the breast could indicate cancer. Many do not have the privilege to identify these things and I feel bad about them. People often take their bodies for granted. However, if the cancer is not spotted early enough, it could lead to serious repercussions.
Sai Sangitha: stay strong
A thing you have to come in terms with after breast cancer is that your body is never going to look the same and for some, it might not even feel the same. But, don’t let it take a toll on you, for you braved death before standing here today. I was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was 25 years old and fought it for five years. I was extremely beauty conscious and being diagnosed in such a young age was a shocker. My husband supported me throughout the journey and helped me build confidence post-cancer. Also, your mental health post the treatment can be affected.
You must ensure you talk to people and not isolate yourself, because that was what I did and faced severe consequences. After braving cancer, I had to go to a psychiatrist for two years for therapy. I got sick of questions from people — what I did to get cancer, whether I was binge drinking, smoking or was it something else. You must realise that you owe nothing to them, but only to the family that stood beside you, and stay strong. Today, I try to speak to as many people as I can on cancer, just to educate them. There is so much on the Internet on what to do in the pre-cancer stage, but nothing useful on post-cancer trauma. There is only one mantra you must follow — stay strong and keep talking to those around you.
VASANTHI: BE HAPPY, EVERY DAY
As I was getting ready to go to the UK to meet my son in April 2018, I noticed a lump in my breast. I could feel a hard mass. But I didn’t want to postpone my trip as my granddaughter was eagerly waiting to meet me. I told my husband that something is wrong, but we can come back and check it. So we left and returned in July 2018.
We visited the doctor the very next day. The doctor immediately took a mammogram and noticed something. He advised me to take a biopsy. The biopsy confirmed malignancy.
I was diagnosed with triple-negative cancer, which meant that I couldn’t undergo hormone therapy. The treatment would involve surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. The doctor decided to do the surgery first and then start chemotherapy.
After my surgery on August 8, 2018, I underwent eight cycles of chemotherapy. It is during chemo that our mind gets very disturbed. It is the mind which is affected more than the body as there are medicines to overcome physical side effects. During chemo, your hair falls completely. You feel very awkward to go outside. If we follow what doctors say, you can overcome cancer. I also have unshakeable faith in God. It has helped me immensely.
My family was my strength during treatment. My two sons are gems. My younger son came from New Zealand and stayed with me for six months. My elder son and daughter-in-law came after he left and stayed with me for four months. My husband was my pillar of strength. It is our family which gives us courage. I also had very good doctors.
We have to find courage from within. Having breast cancer is not a big deal in today’s world. We should have the determination and willpower to come out of it.
My mantra is that we should be happy through the days we are alive. Death can come to anyone, anytime, with or without cancer. I had asked the doctor what would happen if I don’t undergo treatment. The doctor told me — and these words had a great impact on me — “Even if you live for one day, you should live happily and have a quality life.” Positive thinking and a positive approach can get you through any problem.
Asha Krishnan: second chances
Sixteen years ago when my daughter was only a year old, I discovered a lump on my breast. I ignored it for over four months, but when the uneasiness increased, I went to the doctor. That was when I was diagnosed with cancer. The doctors did not really tell me how long I would live, but in my head I had decided that I only had a year. I underwent chemotherapy which was extremely painful. I had no energy to walk or talk and started ignoring everyone, even my daughter. But three months later, I realised hope is the key and that I will do whatever I like before I die.
When I was a kid, I loved sketching — a passion that got lost over time. I slowly started sketching on the bed, interacting with the hospital staff and talking to my child. Surprisingly, I found myself to be more energetic, despite the increase in medicine dosage. I fought cancer for 12 years and defeated it. Now, I am a completely different person. I always feel the urge to be young and lively. After all, life doesn’t really give you second chances, but it had given one to me and I am not going to waste it. One important thing all women should remember is, if you feel uneasy or find lumps on your breasts, visit a doctor immediately. Quicker the diagnosis, more the chances you stand at having a long life.
VIDYA: BATTLING INNER DEMONS
As I prepared to celebrate my 35th birthday, I felt an intense pain in my breast. I tried to ignore it, but the pain persisted for a few days. When I told my husband, he insisted that we go to the doctor. The doctor asked me to take a mammogram.
After the mammogram and biopsy, I was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma. The doctor assured us that it was in the initial stages and could be treated easily. For me, it seemed like my world came crashing down. As I looked at my husband and my two-year-old son, I was unable to control my tears. I broke down as I thought of the toll the treatment would have on my family. How was I going to manage my family, job and treatment? It seemed impossible. As soon as my parents heard the news, they came rushing, and so did my in-laws. They were as shattered as me. My son, oblivious to what was happening, was overjoyed to see both the paatis and thathas.
It was decided that I would first undergo surgery and then five rounds of chemo and 25 rounds of radiation. I initially assumed I could go to office between chemo sessions, but it was a hard battle. I luckily had a very understanding boss. More than the physical strain, cancer puts an enormous mental strain on you. You constantly have to battle your inner demons. Hair fall was my biggest worry as I was very vain about my thick hair. As my hair started falling, I got it shaved. My son loved playing with my bald head. I used to don a wig for the first few months, but as my hair started growing back, I let it be and loved my pixie cut. After five rounds of chemo, your body becomes frail and weak. I thought I was the only one who got cancer when I was young, but I was so wrong. I met people who were diagnosed in their 20s or 30s, and their stories gave me immense strength.
Today, I have been free from cancer for three years, have got a promotion at my job and will be moving to Singapore soon. What got me through was my family’s immense support and my inner strength. Ladies, don’t be afraid of cancer, just get tested regularly, especially if there is a family history.