For the last two weeks, I had two choices on screen. World Cup or World War?
A few confusing similarities: the ball and rockets go up and down in the same way, they say it’s a world level event but only a few countries take part, thankfully. And both have high TRP ratings.
The differences are: the World Cup is a game but played like a war, and the World War is a war which Trump is playing like a video game. And innocents are dying. Which is why I choose the World Cup for now.
I have been watching cricket since 2002. That is a long time to follow a team that mostly lost. My uncles who watched cricket in the 80s used to ask me before every match, ‘Who will win today?’ I would say the toss has not even happened yet. They would ask again anyway. Because back then, nine out of ten times, the answer was always the same. Not India.
In the 90s, we watched as long as Sachin was batting. The moment he got out, the TV went off. The rest of the batting order had names like Navjot Singh Sidhu and Sanjay Manjrekar. These are not names you think of when you think of batting. Not then. Not now. Not ever.
Then came Dhoni. We started winning a little more. Three trophies, yes, but also many semi-finals and finals where we would raise expectations like a new startup and then collapse, cry, and file bankruptcy.
And now this. Back to back ICC trophies. India wins so often that nobody takes their shirt off to celebrate anymore. Ganguly removed his shirt at Lord’s in 2002 and the whole country noticed his love handles. Now every cricketer has a six pack but we don’t remove shirts because we win almost every match. Why celebrate the obvious.
My friends who watched the final with me said it was getting boring. Too one-sided. I looked at them the way you look at someone who is an East India Company sympathiser.
My inner child who cried after the 2003 final is slowly healing. I now understand what it felt like to be an Australian fan in the 2000s. They were like the Ambanis of the business world. They just did not lose. At anything. Ever.
But cricket is not just about India winning. There are other good reasons to watch.
First, the players are accountable. After every match, the captain sits in a press conference and answers real questions. People asked why Sanju Samson was not playing. The captain has to answer. In public. On camera.
Imagine if this happened with roads. ‘Sir, why is this flyover taking twelve years?’ Same format. The world would be a much better place.
Second, cricketers never fight back. You can troll them, abuse them, question their luck, their stars, their kundali. They say nothing. The only way they reply is through their performance.
We called Kohli finished. He got a century. We called him Sanju Scamson. He won Man of the Tournament. Try doing the same with any other department in India and the next day your house will have a new guest, a JCB.
Third, there is no gap. The World Cup just ended. IPL starts in a few days. And that is where even our enemies like Australians become friends. The world war doesn’t have this option, which I will pray ends soon. But for my eyes, the sight of a cricket ball going up and coming down is better than rockets going up and down, the stock market going up and down, and gas prices going up and up.
Sandesh
@msgfromsandesh
(This comedian is here to tell funny stories about Hyderabad)
(The writer’s views are his own)