Love is a powerful emotion. No doubt about it. It is positive, and fills the heart and body with a feeling of wellbeing; of being able to conquer the world. But it is more personal, more focused. And you can say it’s more of a one-on-one emotion. Which means it’s easy to love a parent, a child, even all one’s children, a spouse or lover, but when it comes to loving your neighbours, or all humanity…
Ah, that’s not quite easy. It’s as if the emotion gets more and more diffused as it spreads. And finally disappears. Loving more than those one holds dear is tough, and even in such cases, it’s not an emotion that can indefinitely burn with the brightness of a constant flame. It settles down to a dull ember, that might need a challenge or a crisis to flare into force again.
Hate... Ah, that’s quite another thing altogether. Unlike love, hate is a definite. It has power and focus. And perversely, it can make one feel almost the same degree of wellbeing as love, at least for a while. Hate has focus, it can be aimed at a person, a neighbour and his family, a community, an entire universe of people… hate sees no grey, no white, it’s a pure black. It’s rich with emotion, a full-blooded thirst. Perhaps the reason hate wins over love is, unlike love, it’s impersonal.
One does not need a personal reason to hate. You may love someone for the way they look or talk, or for who they are, their achievements, their compassion. Hate could also flow from similar personal reactions; but it can be evoked in other ways. While it is difficult to evoke an active love by pointing out the good things in others, and asking for them to be loved, it’s easier to evoke hate. Because hate feeds on fear, coming as it does in packages that contain threats to the ego, to the self.
And so we grow into a nation of hate. We hate in degrees, first those who challenge us, then those that are different, then those we are told are threats, and need to be feared, those who may have been friends, neighbours, colleagues, but now are definitely to be perceived as enemies. Hate is a torch that ignites easily, and burns indefinitely, needing little to fan it. But what we do not realise is that hate kills. Not just the perceived enemy.
Hate’s poison as it flows through the arteries and veins, loads the silt of hatred, constricting them. It’s true, the heart constricts with hate and anger, expands with love and joy. And more people who live in hate die sooner than those who live in love. The latter are long-lived, unless their lives are cut short by someone who hates. That’s the truth of it, hate is a serious enemy; it turns on those who nurture it. So then, because you chose to believe what others tell you, hate, hate, hate. If you must. The risk is yours.
Sathya Saran
Author & Consulting Editor, Penguin Random House
saran.sathya@gmail.com