Income tax has probably made more liars out of people than anything else, opined American humorist Will Rogers. Yet, it could perhaps be justifiably termed a necessary evil — necessary since the government needs the money to fund its various development projects and an evil from the cash-strapped individual taxpayer’s perspective! While I was in service, the necessity of income tax used to be hotly debated by my tax-paying colleagues, the consensus being that the salaried class should be exempted altogether — a pipedream, of course, that has never materialised.
I recall how in the 1970s my British bosses used to wait, fretting and fuming, for their all-important income tax clearance certificate prior to proceeding home on furlough or superannuation. For an expatriate, it was as vital as his passport since, without it, no personal funds whatsoever could be transferred to the UK. Indeed many a Brit heaved a sigh of relief when he got his without any awkward queries being raised!
My first introduction to income tax came when, as a fresher in the tea industry, I chanced upon an unfinished letter written by a young British planter to his mother in Coonoor. “I’m sorry I can’t send you any money this month,” he lamented, “because some wise guy out here has started tinkering with taxes, halving my take-home pay.” This filial devotion, I felt, deserved the department’s sympathy. My next brush with it came years later when my Scottish boss imprudently questioned the authority of an income tax officer to tax certain perks that he considered patently non-taxable. Then, realising his folly, he dispatched me posthaste on a peace mission — armed with two kilos of export-quality tea — to smooth ruffled feathers!
On a lighter vein, given its universal unpopularity, income tax has inevitably become the butt of jokes. “What’s the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector?” demanded Mark Twain, adding mordantly, “The taxidermist takes only your skin.” Writer Austin O’Malley advocated moderation in taxation when he observed, “In levying taxes and in shearing sheep, it is advisable to stop when you get down to the skin.”
On the other hand, writer Thomas Dewar once wisecracked insightfully, “The one thing that hurts more than paying income tax, is not having to pay income tax.” This, of course, is an absolute truism since it reflects low income and, worse, lowers one’s standing! I once read about an income tax office in the UK that sports a signboard, Mind your step, as one enters and another cautioning, Mind your language, as one exits. They may have lost public sympathy but certainly not their sense of humour!