Our family is back from vacation and this time we set some strict rules regarding screen time on the road. And by strict I mean they were made of play-doh and sometimes we twisted them to suit our needs.
Controlling and monitoring our children’s screen time has become one of the most discussed parenting topics these days. And it’s a hard thing to do. Unless you’re one of those people who have managed to raise children who don’t know that Bikini Bottom is the place where Sponge Bob and friends live. If that is the case then: a) you should be writing this piece b) I have utmost respect for you and c) I hate you a little.
As parents, we start out using screens to distract, soothe and occupy our children. I’ve done it. When my children are fighting it out like Atilla the Hun and Genghis Khan, switching the television on or allowing them to play a game seems like a much better option than actually trying to mediate and settle the burning question of who is the bigger anus. Their words, not mine. My children have discovered the art of classy put-downs.
But with all the research that show the effects of unchecked screen time: addiction, mental health issues, stunted development, horns growing on their heads (okay, that last one has not to be substantiated) parents are becoming increasingly, and rightfully worried about how much time their kids are online. So much so, that in some countries (Hi America!) they’re hiring screen-time consultants to tackle the problem. That’s right! For anywhere between US$80 to US$250 an hour, someone will come and teach you how to set limits on screen consumption and share tips on how to otherwise occupy your child.
The New York Times article shared some ideas from one consultant: Kick a ball. Use an old towel as a cape. Get them a pet. Deep down we all know what needs to be done. But why are we finding it so difficult to do these things? Are we scared? Looking for a quick fix? Is it because the alternative is to actually spend time with our kids and God don’t we already do enough of that? Is it because we’d rather be on our phones ourselves? Why have we become so unsure of ourselves as parents despite all the information out there on parenting? Perhaps it’s because of all this well-intentioned advice that we find ourselves here: Afraid of how a five-year-old might react when we say ‘No More Peppa!’
We had moderate success with our screen rule on vacation. We managed to restrict it to inside the room after a day out, on flights and in lounges. We mostly managed to avoid it on long rides. The kids heard new languages, chatted to our guide and ‘gasp’ looked out the window. We’ve come back home hoping to continue this and at the same time monitor our use of devices. Because the saddest thing on vacation was finding myself on a gorgeous beach and seeing rows of adults and children on recliners, staring at… their phone.
Given my moderate success with my kids, I’m thinking of becoming a screen-time consultant myself. Here’s the first tip for free: the pet thing works!
Menaka Raman
@menakaraman
The writer’s philosophy is: if there’s no blood, don’t call me