It’s been a bad month, healthwise. Dodgy, steamy weather and a perpetually-overcast sky have created a still environment that appears to be chock-a-bloc with germs. In office, we’re surrounded by coughing, wheezing, sneezing colleagues. At home, I have an ailing mother, maid and myself to tend to. Tired of taking, giving and—most importantly—paying for medication, last evening I turned to my favourite medical practitioner for advice and enlightenment. Here’s what I learnt from Dr Google:
1. People have been going about their business interactions all wrong all these years. They should never have listened to parents, teachers and management pundits who said a firm, friendly handshake was the best way to make a good impression on strangers and reiterate feelings of warmth towards old associates. The fuddy-duddies may have found support from studies conducted as recently as 2012 which reaffirmed the neurological and emotional benefits of a handshake but they definitely ignored its unhealthy aspects. New research says a handshake spreads germs faster than greased lightning. The duration of the greeting and the intensity matter too; a long or strong shake can do more damage than a plain-vanilla clasp, and heaven help you if your hand-holder has been pushing elevator buttons or using door handles, or worse still, is a doctor. It’s time to embrace the fist-bump. Twenty times more hygienic than a handshake, it must become everyone’s greeting of choice. If a closed fist won’t convince strangers that you’re not carrying arms—which is said to have been the original purpose of a handshake—you can try a high five. It may not seem as businesslike as a shake, but it will spread only half as many germs. Just remember to raise, slap and release. Smiling optional.
2. Those who have been shunning spicy food to protect their stomachs have been doing their body—and sex life—a great disservice. Not only does capsaicin—the spicy chemical in chillies—activate cell receptors in the intestinal lining, thereby cutting the risk of developing a tumour, it also improves your blood circulation and stimulate your nerve endings. In other words, no fear of tummy tumours and speedy tingling of those erogenous zones. What’s not to like?
3. Marijuana is the toke of the town. Ok, medical marijuana. Toronto got its first two medical marijuana clinics this summer. The facilities don’t keep the stuff on its premises but are staffed with physicians who assess patients suffering from chronic pain or debilitating illnesses and prescribe the drug as necessary. In the US, Florida has already passed a limited-access cannabis law while California is looking at legalising its cultivation and safe distribution.
4. Virgo equals karmic vitality. Ok, I made that up. This last point needs a little more study. A British MP, who is a member of the government’s Health and Science and Technology committees, has recommended merging astrology with medicine and healthcare. The details are a little hazy. Perhaps, the gent (of course, the idea comes from a man) believes there’s a connect because doctors, like astrologers, make predictions (aka diagnosis) based on signs (think stomach ache, fever). Wonder how Linda Goodman would have gone about seeking medical answers in the stars. Is this a sign of the way science will play out in the future? Watch this space.
shampa@newindianexpress.com