Another Women’s Day. The usual noises, the usual faces and for us ordinary mortals, the usual fare of stock phrases.This year’s theme for International Women’s Day 2019 is #BalanceforBetter, gender balance. For some time, we have been aware of the phrase glass ceiling in the case of career woman. She can see it but never touch or reach it, for it remains a barrier to the progress of women.
Recently in Kerala, there was this much touted women’s wall. Oh, does it mean she’s to be cloistered? A wall—whether physical or mental—is a wall, separating, drawing a line between people and isolating. Yet others talked about a women’s chain, which is definitely more soothing. Soothing, because it tells you there are others like you, which incidentally brings about a sense of sisterhood.
A TV channel screened the Malayalam movie Ozhimuri earlier this week and believe it or not, I was viewing it for the first time. I had heard about it before. I had heard people praise it and it was critically acclaimed too. As is the predictable problem with high expectations, I was disappointed by the film. The liberated woman’s words at the end, that she feels liberated because she is not a wife anymore, somehow sounded like cliché.
Some of us seem to equate women empowerment mostly with suppression under men and liberation from such oppression. Why can’t we think of enrichment? It’s not always men. There are other things, the sense of guilt and the habit of blaming others, for example. Not having to be answerable to anyone, not responsible for anyone or accountable to anyone: Does it liberate?
As you grow older, you realise your idea of empowerment now is not what it was when you were 20, 30 or 40. But something has indeed still remained the same: Back then, you wanted your space and now too, you want your space. Getting liberated never meant getting separated from a partner, but learning how to make the best of any situation. It is this capacity and capability that is to be nurtured. Recently a relative of mine, ‘fresh’ from divorce, said with nostalgia: “I wouldn’t say it was that bad. We also had our great moments.”
Empowerment is building on such great moments, making them work to your betterment as an individual as well as a team player. Nothing more, nothing less.
Lalitha Ramakrishnan
Email: maashu1@gmail.com