With only women facing abuse in almost all instances of one-sided love, activists feel that society’s objectification of the female gender is to be blamed for the violence. A vast majority in the society sees women an object of beauty, they say.
As a consequence, when emotionally imbalanced men get offended, they resort to abusing the opposite sex based on misconception of the female gender.
Chennai-based advocate and women’s activist Sudha Ramalingam feels that the issue needs to be addressed on a broader platform aiming to change this misconception of the society. “In all incidents, jilted lovers resort to violent means to destroy the beauty of women only to make them undesirable for any other man. Acid attacks or stab injuries often leave the victim to live a dreaded life,” she points out.
According to her, it is infatuation that always prompts men to commit such violence when they get offended. Such men rarely display true affection. Sudha adds that the patriarchal way of societal functioning impacts men committing such violence due to the gender dominance factor.
“When a man gets rebuked by another man, he may not resort to violence. The patriarchal manner in which society is functioning still portrays women as inferior to men. Hence men resort to savage violence when offended by the opposite sex,” she says.
The lawyer-activist feels that education should equip society to come out of such misconceptions and highlight that equality and equal right is guaranteed to both sexes.
According to Dr V Ponni Muralidharan, consultant psychiatrist, KG Hospital and Post Graduate Medical Institute, Coimbatore, women should also don a proactive role in preventing such situations.
“Women can avoid giving wrong signals to men to avoid such situations. Also, she can be clear on her stands from the very beginning of such relations. She can explain these things to the man in the company of friends to ensure more safety,” she says. Dr Ponni adds that parental guidance and healthy involvement by peers can help to bring a happy ending to any strained relations. “In many cases, the affected parties seek the help of experts after the incident. Proper counseling must be ensured to both parties as many such violent incidents happen among adolescent age groups,” she says.