BENGALURU: I have never been a huge fan of new year resolutions. I usually avoid them altogether, or set the bar really low to make them quite achievable. For instance, one year, my resolution was not to smoke beedis. Another year, it was not to kill another human being. For you see, the trick with New Year resolutions is to set achievable ones to begin with. Most people set unrealistic resolutions and set themselves up for disappointment.
As much as I find the concept of resolutions corny, I can’t deny that I like the silly optimism that comes it. In my younger days, I used to religiously set resolutions for myself. But they were all so cliched that I disappointed myself. Eat healthy, workout, write more often, read more books - even listing them out used to bore me in the first few days of January. And then comes Sankranti, and enough food is cooked to feed entire Zilla Parishads, and all my resolutions fly sheepishly out of the window.
The real problem with resolutions is that they are extremely selfish in nature. Since the pandemic has struck, I like to believe that I have become a saner, calmer, more sensitive person. And pre-pandemic resolutions just don’t cut it for me anymore. I need a modern resolution.
Upon further thinking, I noticed something about myself. I work as a standup comedian, film critic, and humour columnist. Which means that most of my work revolves around finding the funny, offensive or absurd in things around me. To my shock, I found that I usually run out of words when I have to praise someone.
And this is true of society in general. When we praise, we resort to generic lines. ‘Great knock’, ‘fantastic movie’, ‘nice guy’ — these are all sorry compromises of words that make everything good sound homogenous and boring. But when we have to criticise, we dig deep into our brains. We conjoin references, use similes and analogies. Incidents from the past merge magically with the choicest swear words. We then garnish the criticism with a few jokes, and serve hot with a plateful of sarcasm. When we step out of a good movie, we use the same phrases over and over again. But watch a bad movie, and you’ll find yourself writing Baradwaj Rangan-like essays on how terrible the film was.
And so, my resolution for 2022 is going to be more generic in my criticism, and specific in my praise. God knows the world needs more positivity, and less criticism. It helps people around you feel good about their lives, and if used judiciously at work, could also lead to bonuses, hikes and other riches coming your way. And since you’re reading a humour column on a Wednesday (and hence keeping the delightful practice of humour columns alive), I shall pass on my resolution to you, dear reader, free of any royalty charges.
So that is my new year’s resolution for this year, one I am fairly confident that I shall achieve. I shall be more specific in my praise, and generic in my criticism. That, and I shall not kill any rhinoceros this year!
(The writer’s views are his own)