BENGALURU: This weekend, a ‘couple’ who married a year or two ago will be throwing a party in Sri Lanka. No...not for their anniversary, instead, it’s a divorce party. A smaller version of their sangeet, the parting couple is flying down a hundred of their friends to be part of a gathering that celebrates their ‘falling out of love’. And a big name in the music industry who performed at their lavish wedding celebrations has been roped in again to perform at this ‘parting party’. “Divorce parties are not exclusive to Bollywood, it’s happening among us too,” says a friend of the ‘couple’ attending this celebration of a different kind.
Welcome to today’s reality (In Real Life- IRL as it’s called) where divorce parties, swipe fatigue, and mixers are part of daily lingo. Rohinie Gupta, a Bengaluruean from the last 15 years celebrated the end of her marriage with her friends and family. “It was a private affair with my family and very close friends. My legal divorce took almost four years, even though it was a mutual one. The four years of separation were very tough and it was just to welcome new beginnings with peace, love, and happiness and there were no hard feelings for my ex,” shares Gupta.
Fatigue, and more fatigue
There was a time not long ago when the depiction of love was quite straightforward: girl meets boy, they fall for each other and live happily ever after – or so we assumed. Aside from having a love triangle or family pressure here and there, it seemed to be an open and shut case. But in the last decade, the proliferation of dating apps has redefined the landscape of love and companionship.
At the same time, a certain fatigue seems to have set in when it comes to looking for a potential partner, especially on apps. “There’s a lot of fatigue, especially after the pandemic. These dating apps offer too many choices. At the end of the day, you’re not going to decide until you meet them in real life. And then it might be completely different,” says Ashwini Jaisim, founder of The Singles Club India.
Abrar Basith, organiser of singles’ mixers from 2020, agrees that there is evident exhaustion from endless swiping on dating apps. “The fatigue is real. I will just quote an attendee – she said being on dating apps is like having a bad part-time job,” says Basith with a laugh. He further adds, “The fact that profiles need to be boosted has also made these apps very expensive. Another fundamental issue is the lack of equal ratio of men and women; and fake identities creating a huge amount of trust deficit. People are getting jaded because they are spending more time online on dating apps than actually going out and meeting people.”
Ekta Singh, founder of Ekta’s Gathering, has been curating singles’ mixers, blending art therapy and dance into the dating experience. “People think that if there are singles’ mixers, only men will turn up, but when I did the events, women showed up too,” shares Singh, who believes that everyone is looking for comfort and a safe space where they can unwind especially after the pandemic – which seems to be a big ask.
Love in the middle of traffic in B’luru?
For a city that runs on high octane all the time, traffic can sometimes be excruciatingly slow. But long drives can be a great date option, as revealed in Bumble’s recent study that found 40 per cent of Indian Gen-Z respondents prefer going on long drives for dates.