BENGALURU: Draped in sarees and adorned with traditional jewellery, these women in their 80s, but 18 at heart, walked down the ramp, receiving a loud applause from the audience.
Behind this moment of joy stands Greys Matter, an initiative by Hearts Ever Young (HEY), a group of 17 neighbours from Cooke Town. HEY organised this event to bring together all elder members in the group. What began as a small gathering of nine elderly women has now grown into a close-knit circle of nearly 30 members, meeting every month to share love, grief and friendship.
On October 18, the group members organised the event for their elders. With ramp walks, dances to popular songs of the 60s and skits, each of them got excited with every performance that reminded them of the golden moments they had in the past.
“It’s been so long since I’ve been on stage and it feels very good,” said Belinda Fernandez, a member of Greys Matter.
It all started when members of HEY, who have been friends for a long time, decided to meet one day. This led to their frequent meetings. “We didn’t just want to meet for a potluck dinner,” said Regina Thomas, one of the founders.
“We wanted to do something meaningful, something for older adults who are often ignored or misunderstood. Thus, the idea of Greys Matter came up,” she said.
The first meeting took place with just nine elderly women. Today, that small circle has grown into a community of nearly 30 members, all meeting once a month or coming together to celebrate birthdays, festivals and other special occasions or simply be there for one another.
Each session is unique, from yoga and sing-alongs to art, games and discussions on health, safety and wellbeing. Experts are invited to deliver lectures on topics such as health and fitness. The group members also gather just to dance, play housie or other games or go for picnics and outings.
“We look forward to our once-a-month meeting like children waiting for a school picnic. We giggle, laugh loud, make fun of each other and become childish, a reminder that we still have so much to give,” said a member of Greys Matter. “They love being out in the open. At every picnic, there’s food, laughter and an exchange of stories. You see them come alive again,” said Lata Jacob, a member of HEY.
The connections, however, go deeper than these celebrations. Greys Matter has become a circle of empathy, a place where elders find themselves seen and understood for who they truly are. Some of them are in their late 80s, even 90s, and they see the organisation as a reason to be hopeful. “I’ve been here for so many years, but never had a group that connected me this much. At this age of almost 80, to find a group like this feels like a blessing. It fills a void that loneliness leaves behind,” said Yvonne Pereira of Greys Matter.
“One of our members woke up at 5 am asking her granddaughter to help her with lipstick before the event,” laughs Meera Prasad, a member of HEY. “That’s how much it means to them,” she said.
Over a period of time, the members formed smaller circles such as scrabble club, walking partners or just friends who call each other every evening. A WhatsApp group keeps everyone connected, filled with pictures, jokes, arguments and affection.
“It’s like an extended family,” said Regina. “They may have lost their partners or live away from their children, but here, they have each other,” she added.
It’s not just love and happiness that they share, but also grief, something they were never taught to deal with and even in moments of loss, the group stands strong. “When a member passed away some time ago, they mourned together, observing silence and sharing memories,” said Meera.
Greys Matter is getting stronger with each passing day not as a formal organisation, but as a living, breathing community of care, proving that ageing doesn’t mean slowing down. It means living fully, surrounded by love and laughter.
Driven by care, compassion and the simple belief that life doesn’t stop at 75, Greys Matter has become much more than a club. It’s a home away from home, a reminder that every wrinkle carries a story, and a heart that has been pounding through decades which still hopes to feel special and loved.
