Mooji, could you explain self-inquiry? How do I actually begin?
Begin like this: I am, I exist. This is the most natural recognition and knowledge. The sense of existence is spontaneously felt in you as ‘I am’. No one taught this to you. Be aware of this simple intuition, without associating it with other thoughts. Feel how it is to be simply present in this instant, without holding onto any intention. Don’t touch any thought of doing something special. Keep inwardly quiet. If suddenly a wave of thoughts should come, don’t panic. There is no need to control or suppress them. Simply let them play without your involvement. Observe empty of intention. Keep quiet.
Imagine you are standing on a platform at the railway station. One by one the trains come — they stop, doors open, doors close, they move on. You don’t have to get on. Like this, simply observe the thought activity appearing on the screen of consciousness without connecting up. Don’t log on. Thoughts and sensations will be seen to move on by themselves, without being forced. Stay neutral. Be with the awareness as awareness itself. Feel the breath moving effortlessly, without will or strain. Observe the senses functioning, the sense of the outer and inner; any movement is just happening by itself, unplanned and unforced.
Whatever arises as thought, feeling, movement or sensation is quietly observed, only now there is less interest, less pull. All is arising; your self is not aroused.
All this is smoothly observed. Even the sense of self, the feeling ‘I am’, is appearing inside the awareness. Make no greater effort than is required. You are here. That which is neither doing nor undoing, neither directing activity nor being affected by activity, which is effortlessly aware yet unconcerned, that is your real self.
Not behind nor in front, nor above nor beneath, for it is not another phenomenon. It is unplaced, unborn, boundless awareness -- self.
Now, observe the observer: ‘Who am I?’ Check inwardly but remain quiet with alert attention. Don’t collect any answer or clues; an answer would and could only be an opinion, an idea or another concept. Don’t tie yourself to any concept. Turn the attention away from objects towards the viewing subject. What and where is the seer?
Remain silent and neutral. There should now be an increased strength of focus in the looking.
Now, again, watch the sense ‘I am’. What is ‘I’? From where does it arise? Watch. What do you find? It cannot be found. It does not exist!
It cannot be found objectively. Nevertheless, the ‘I’ sense or intuition continues to be present. It is the non-finding of ‘I’, phenomenally, that proves its non-objective existence.
‘I’ or ‘I am’ is found to be without form, an intuition arising from, in, and as emptiness. Without focused inquiry, ‘I’ appears to be an entity comprised of body and conditioned mind.
When searched for as a form, it is found to be merely a thought; the form of ‘I’ is thought. Formless, it arises from emptiness as the intuitive sense of subjective presence.
Now that ‘I’ is found to be a formless presence, what recognises this? Does this possess form? Inquire like this.
Discourse by Mooji (Anthony Paul Moo-Young), disciple of Sri H W L Poonja or Papaji. More on www.mooji.org