Are you really fine?

Shwetha Sivaraman, author of 'Far from Fine', challenged the students of MOP Vaishnav College for Women to reflect upon this topic at Author Speak
Author Shwetha Sivaraman
Author Shwetha SivaramanSRIRAM R
Updated on
3 min read

Ever find yourself feeling overwhelmed by the constant pressure of work, relationships, or just life in general? The stress builds up, and all you want is to switch off for a bit. You turn on Modern Family, laugh at Phil’s antics, and for a while, everything else fades away. It’s a welcome escape, right? But what happens when this becomes a habit? When the distractions start to feel like a routine, and we forget to ask ourselves, “Are we really fine?”

This is the exact thought that Shwetha Sivaraman, author of Far from Fine, challenged the students of MOP Vaishnav College for Women to reflect upon at Author Speak held in association with The New Indian Express. The cosy auditorium created the perfect backdrop for a conversation about living life on autopilot and being truly fine.

After a prayer song, the head of the English Department, R Jayalakshmi, took the stage to felicitate Shwetha, expressing pride in seeing her former student shine as an accomplished author and coach. “What could be a happier moment for a teacher than to see her student on this stage?” she remarked, urging the students in the room to aim for similar heights.

Shwetha began her session by reflecting on the dissatisfaction she had felt in her own life. “Monday mornings were always sad, and Friday evenings, a relief,” she shared, making the audience chuckle as she pulled up a meme of Ross Geller shouting, “I’m fine!” – the perfect illustration of how we often say we’re okay, when deep down, we’re far from it.

Drawing from her personal journey, Shwetha explained how she left her corporate job in 2019 to become a coach, podcaster, and author. “I wrote this book as a wake-up call,” she said, “to help people recognise when they’re on autopilot, just going through the motions without truly living.”

The book, she explained, is divided into three parts: Are You Fine?, How to Be Fine?, and Beyond Fine. The first section, which makes up half the book, dives into why so many of us are far from fine. Shwetha’s own life had been an ongoing search for satisfaction, and she now helps others navigate similar challenges.

“When we don’t take a step back and reflect, life becomes a series of symptoms we try to patch up,” she said, showing a picture of a road crack with a small band-aid over it. “But real change starts when we address the root causes.”

Shwetha discussed the patterns she’d observed in her clients: stress, numbness, bad relationships, emotional illiteracy, and a general sense of disengagement from life. “So many of us are walking around saying we’re fine, but there’s always more beneath the surface,” she noted.

She encouraged the audience to think deeply and introspect: What is it that’s holding us back from real change? “I noticed two things,” she continued. “One, we tell ourselves, ‘It’s not that bad.’ And the other, ‘What else is there?' When we think we have no other choice, we stick to what we know, even if it’s making us miserable.”

Her message was clear: Don’t wait for life’s crises to force you to change. She offered a framework for intentional living, urging everyone to create their own formula for life, one that doesn’t rely on generic advice or cookie-cutter solutions. “Living with intention isn’t about drastic, overnight changes. It’s about doing everything – even the smallest tasks – with energy and awareness.”

She shared four key steps to transition from autopilot to intentional living: calm, clarity, confidence, and consistency. The key takeaway? Awareness is a muscle that needs to be built and cultivated every day, in everything we do.

Shwetha wrapped up with a powerful reminder: “Life is precious. This moment will never come again. Are you truly living today?”

As the floor opened for questions, the audience engaged deeply, asking about how to overcome the discomfort of introspection and how to know when it’s time to make a change. Shwetha’s responses were thoughtful, rooted in emotional intelligence and practical wisdom. Her advice? Start small, build awareness, and pay attention to the emotions that guide your decisions.

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