HYDERABAD: Have you noticed there are more malnourished Santas sweating outside Chandana Brothers outlets than there are actual Christians in India? That’s Hyderabad for you — where Christmas isn’t just a holiday; it’s an annual spectacle of capitalism dressed up in red, white, and synthetic beards. And honestly? It’s glorious.
Take the Christmas tree at GVK Mall, for instance. It’s so over-the-top, even the tree at St Mary’s Church must be questioning its faith. Restaurants join the festive spirit by adding red and green food colouring to everything from pasta to pulao. And every year, Maa Saraswati Vidya Mandir — a school otherwise dedicated to Sanskrit shlokas — suddenly bursts into Jingle Bells. That’s the magic of Christmas, folks: it makes everyone forget their affiliations, at least for the last six days of the year.
Is Christmas really that big in India? Yes. Did the 1.5% Christian population make it this popular? Absolutely not. If you do a DNA test, you’ll find Santa Claus is more closely related to Uncle Sam than to Jesus Christ. Jesus preached love and forgiveness. Uncle Sam sold us fairy lights that stop working after one night, inflatable Santas that look hungover, and Santa caps that can’t keep anyone warm. Guess which idea caught on faster? Exactly.
A festival hijacked by capitalism
The brilliance of Christmas’s success lies in how far it’s been kept from Christ. It’s no longer about sermons or scripture. That’s the power of a capitalistic Christmas: it doesn’t care about your faith; it just makes you buy things.
The StarOriginally, the star was like the OG GPS, guiding the three wise men to Jesus’s exact pin location. But in Hyderabad, if you see a star dangling from a balcony, it’s less about divine guidance and more about identifying which house you should hit up for plum cake.
The Christmas tree despite there being no pine trees in Hyderabad, every home gets a plastic one in December, decked out with plastic balls and bells. People spend hours decorating like it’s a tree fashion show. Did Jesus ask for this? Nope. But Uncle Sam did, and we obeyed.
Secret Santa
Even if you are the most unfestive person on the planet, your office will make you participate in secret santa and happily same folks who were too busy for Rangoli contests now debate if Rs 500 is too cheap or Rs 1,000 too much. The gift exchange? A judgment fest, where Rajesh from IT silently mocks you for the cheap genuine leather wallet you bought him.
Come to my house for Christmas, and here’s what you’ll get: biryani, double ka meetha, and murukulu. My mom and sister rock their best Kanjeevarams, singing carols in Telugu — exactly like in the movie Home Alone. And the plum cake? It’s so sober, it practically comes with a ‘PG-13’ label
And that’s what makes Christmas in India so special. It’s not about religion anymore — it’s about community, joy, and unapologetic consumerism. We’ve stripped out the theology and kept the fun stuff: the lights, the gifts, and the parties Which is why I love this festival. Merry Christmas!
(The writer’s views are his own)