Don't we all pride ourselves on balancing our personal and professional lives, maintaining physical and mental health, and keeping up with our hobbies? If we fail to achieve even one of these, it can throw us off balance. So, we strive for perfection. But in the process, we compromise on sleep. What is life without a good snooze?
In order to get a peaceful night’s rest, did you know that over 78% of couples in India are opting for a ‘sleep divorce’?
Well, that’s the latest buzzword on the internet. With World Sleep Day approaching on March 14, experts decoded this trend for CE.
Before diving into ‘sleep divorce’, it’s crucial to understand why sleep is important and where we often fall short. Adequate sleep resolves many of life’s problems, yet we tend to undervalue it. Dr Satish C Reddy, consultant interventional pulmonologist at CARE Hospitals, Hitec City, explains, “As a doctor, I witness how poor sleep affects my patients’ health, productivity, and relationships. Recent studies, including ResMed’s 2025 Global Sleep Survey, reveal that millions worldwide suffer from inadequate sleep, often unaware of its long-term consequences.”
While most people get about seven hours of sleep every night — meeting the recommended amount — they experience high-quality sleep only for four nights a week. This means nearly three nights of restlessness and inadequate recovery. “Many struggle with falling asleep (34%) or staying asleep (29%) at least three times a week. Despite recognising the importance of sleep, 22% of people do not seek help for their sleep problems,” he adds.
Lack of proper sleep affects more than just energy levels — it impacts mental health, work performance, and overall well-being. Additionally, Dr Reddy highlights a gender gap in sleep quality. “Women experience poorer sleep than men, averaging 3.83 nights of good sleep per week compared to 4.13 for men. Hormonal changes related to menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause significantly contribute to this disparity. The survey found that 38% of women struggle to fall asleep compared to 29% of men, and 51% of women have trouble staying asleep versus 45% of men. Additionally, 20% of women are disturbed by a partner’s snoring or movement, leading to some couples opting for a sleep divorce to improve their sleep quality.”
Understanding sleep divorce
Dr Viswesvaran Balasubramanian, MD, DNB, DM (Pulmonology-Gold Medal), consultant in interventional pulmonology and sleep medicine, points out that sleep divorce has gained traction in recent years as couples seek to balance personal space, individual sleep needs, and relationship dynamics. While the term may sound harsh, sleep divorce simply refers to the practice of couples sleeping in separate beds or bedrooms to improve sleep quality. Once considered taboo or a sign of marital discord, this trend is now recognised as a practical step toward better health, well-being, and relationship harmony.
“At its core, sleep divorce is about prioritising sleep quality rather than signalling relationship trouble. In fact, for many couples, it serves as a way to maintain intimacy and closeness while ensuring that both partners get the rest they need,” says Dr Balasubramanian.
Crucially, sleep divorce does not imply a lack of affection or romance. Instead, it focuses on individual rest needs, acknowledging that quality sleep is essential for a healthy relationship.
Reasons for sleep divorce
Couples opt for sleep divorce for various reasons, including differing sleep patterns, snoring, temperature preferences, restlessness, sleep disorders, and physical comfort. Psychological and health-related factors also play a role. For example, if one partner is recovering from surgery or dealing with chronic pain, sleeping separately can enhance their comfort without disrupting the other’s rest.
Dr Balasubramanian highlights the potential benefits of sleep divorce:
Improved sleep quality
Reduced sleep disruptions
Enhanced intimacy
Greater personal space
Stronger immune system
Improved mood
Better cognitive performance
Reduced risk of chronic conditions like heart disease
However, there are potential downsides. “While many couples benefit from sleep divorce, it can sometimes lead to emotional distance, reduced physical intimacy, and social stigma. Some people view sleeping apart as a sign of relationship trouble, which may cause feelings of shame or embarrassment. Additionally, some may develop sleep-related anxiety,” he explains.
“Sleep divorce, when approached thoughtfully and communicated openly, can be a healthy and practical choice for couples looking to improve their quality of life,” concludes Dr Balasubramanian.