KOCHI: The lockdown has brought together families and strengthened relationships in many homes. But that fairy tale isn’t the same everywhere. Dysfunctional families and toxic relationships thrive now more than ever too, putting many at the risk of losing their mental health. To help out people and families facing such a crisis, Sajitha Rasheed, chief mentor at Mind Mojo, has come up with a solution.
“People are in a completely new situation. Even though it is their own family they are locked down with, many might find it challenging. If the woman is employed, she has to juggle work and chores at home. Men might have to get involved with chores they are not used to, while also trying to work.
Children cannot go out and play with friends. Grandparents could be stranded all alone in another state or city. And if they are with family, putting up with their needs might seem demanding. We are all stuck at home, in an entirely unprecedented, unexpected situation. It is in our face and we cannot ignore it,” Sajitha says.
Compared to how our lives were earlier, this quarantine also reduced the alone time we have, creating a lack of privacy. “Gradually, I started hearing from my friends and family about the challenges they are facing. The homemakers get frustrated too, as her workspace and personal time is being consumed by the family, which is usually around at home for a very short span of time- after school, college or office hours. Everyone is always home now, making it harder to maintain discipline and keep the house clean. They have to take up a supervisory role constantly and this can be quite draining,” she adds.
According to her, the homemaker is also forced to share the load on willing or unwilling participants, who may not deliver as expected, “This can lead to conflicts. Not sharing the load also leads to conflict. It is like you have been just married to an entirely new family and you are trying to figure it all out all over again,” Sajitha quips.
But she doesn’t believe that keeping up the morale of your family is a tough task, unless it rests on abuse or dysfunctionality- something that might need professional interference. “All it needs is some sense of humour, a few tweaks in the way we communicate our needs, a bit of discipline and much needed privacy,” said Sajitha.
A mentor and trainer by profession, Sajitha’s job entails facilitating behavioural changes in people to make their life less stressful and more enjoyable. “There is no way I can personally reach people right now, so I thought of making posters that carry tips. I might catch the eye of someone who might be going through that, helping at least one in 100 to make a suitable change,” she says.
She started off the project by sharing the tips among her friends. She then took it to her Facebook page about a week back.Despite not getting any distress calls, Sajitha decided to take up the issue because she heard over 20 to 30 people in her circles complain about her. “An associate who shared my video got a call from his client, asking if I should do counselling. The person later called me and spoke about their issue,” she added. Sajitha is one of the founding members of the Kochi-based NGO called ‘Raising Our Voices Foundation’.