KOCHI: “I did not need glycerin,” says Negha S, the first ever trans actor to win a state award in India, in the poignant scenes in the film Antharam. “The tears came from within me, as the scenes reminded me of incidents in my life.”
Negha played the role of Anjali, a trans woman who marries a cis man in the film, which was written and directed by photojournalist P Abhijith. Her portrayal won her a Kerala state special award in the woman/transgender category.
Hailing from Thanjavur in Tamil Nadu, Negha says Kerala is now her “home”, as this is where she received recognition and respect as an artist. “When I walk to the dais on August 3 to receive the award at the ceremony to be held in Thiruvananthapuram, I will be carrying the trans community on my shoulders,” says Negha. “I will be representing all those hapless people who have been victims of social stigma and, in many cases, shunned by their own families.”
Drawing parallels between Antharam and her life, Negha says the character Anjali gets to experience the joy of motherhood through her stepdaughter but is later forced to leave the house due to circumstances.
“That scene was intense, close to my heart,” she says. “Anjali leaves her home for the sake of her husband and stepdaughter. I, too, had to run away at the age of 18 for the sake of my family, sisters, as they feared getting isolated by other villagers in my hometown.”
Speaking in fluent English and a Mal-Tam mix, Negha adds that though Antharam’s subject was familiar territory, she was initially hesitant to accept the role. “I had done a few short films earlier. But, I got stuck with an inferiority complex - about my body, my face - when Abhijith approached me,” she says. “I pictured myself standing next to a cis man partner. I was not confident, especially with my facial features. But Abhijith was confident, and convinced me about doing justice to the role.”
Negha, a BTech dropout, hopes films like Antharam herald a new age of cinema that would see more trans people being cast in prominent roles. Many talented trans artists are waiting for an opportunity to showcase their skills, she adds. Negha believes Kerala is way better than Tamil Nadu when it comes to accepting the LGBTQ+ community. “I regret not being born here,” she says.
“I have seen members of the community being teased and trolled in many Tamil films. Yes, Vijay Sethupathy’s Super Deluxe (in which the protagonist is a trans woman) was a great film, but it would have been better if the lead role had been given to an actual trans artist.” Of late, some Malayalam films have brilliantly highlighted LGBTQ+ issues, but Antharam stands out as a pathbreaking venture and a call to filmmakers to consider talents from the stigmatised community, say Negha.
“Kerala is inclusive, and the young generation here has been showing the courage to open up about their identities,” she adds “Young directors should come forward to include more trans people in their films. I look forward to acting in more Malayalam films.” Negha, who is currently working on a Tamil project titled The Road, featuring popular actors including Trisha, hopes the state award would help spread awareness, especially among families that isolate trans people.
“The award is an answer to a lot of taunts and questions thrown at me at various stages of my life,” she adds in a stoic tone as we wrap up the interview. Any dream roles? “I want to play as a transwoman with superpowers,” she beams.