Gratitude, thankfulness, an awareness of received grace. From time immemorial, this sentiment’s virtues have been extolled far and wide. On the ground though, we all know it is but a fleeting emotion, which sweeps over us at the time of the received grace but doesn’t stay too long afterwards.
Pity about that. That the emotion doesn’t linger in our consciousness. Because now social scientists have
found that the state of gratitude brings with it a lot of benefits. Simply put, the more we reflect on how grateful we are to someone or some circumstance, the more we bask in a mellow state of mind, the less vulnerable we are to the usual maelstrom inside our hearts and heads.
What are affirmations but a gratitude list? And anyone who, regularly or occasionally, creates a list of affirmations will tell you how they are suffused with a glow of contentment while doing so.
So much so, counsellors now ask people to infuse less-than-happy memories with gratitude. While that will not transform the unsavoury nature of the memory, it will ameliorate the intensity of the negative emotions that are attendant on such recall. Though I’m not too sure the strongest wave of gratitude will actually bring closure to the unpleasant experiences that have left behind a cache of unpleasant memories, there is no doubt that a combination of gratitude for the happier moments in that ultimately unpleasant experience (and, of course, there would have been happier moments), for what the experience has taught you, and for the fact that you are intelligent enough to face up to the memories, will definitely push the dark clouds away.
Those who live with a deep-rooted sense of gratitude for all they have felt, experienced, been granted in tangible and intangible form, are those who exist in a state of grace. They become calmer, and their flow of energy is regulated to positive things, in turn infusing their selves with fresh energy.
Ultimately, it is all about training yourself to focus on the better things in life, even while accepting the less-than-good things that must inevitably happen to you. It is slowly clearing out those cobwebs of negativity, steadily making time for gratitude to become an intrinsic part of our lives. And once it has entered through that door you opened, making sure it stays forever and a day.
Easier said than done, you say? Actually, it is easy, finding just one thing to be grateful about in your life every day. Before you know it, the gratitude you feel for that one thing/person/place/situation, will slowly start to seep colour into all the bad things that jostle for space in your head. Do this regularly and you’ll see the change in yourself in a few weeks’ time. What’s good will shine bright, what’s not so good will exist but at one level below.
And that, if you ask me, is a pretty good way to live.
Sheila Kumar is an author. She can be reached at kumar.sheila@gmail.com.