Sixty years ago we were residing in a small village. Any jingling bell of a bullock cart would kindle the enthusiasm of all about if it was a hint at a visit to strike a matrimonial match, how the bride and groom looked like, if it was a good match, the terms of dowry, etc. I used to get irritated over the coarse attitude of villagers.
There was absolutely no change when I came to the city of Madras. The same rumours with an allonge, “It is their business. Why should we bother?” East, West, North, South — no land is free from gossip.
When I went to California for six-odd months, I met a Punjabi woman, a total stranger, in a park. Within five minutes she started directing heaps of complaints about her daughter-in-law and her grandchildren.
Contrary to my expectations, even during birthday parties with a congregation of office friends, both men and women talk invariably about in-law conflicts or some other inter religious marriage. It is a gossip with pizza in one hand and coke on the other, transcending all barriers. Westerners too are no exceptions.
Many people pretend not to bother about others’ personal affairs. Yet there seems to be an inner urge to know details. Is there a silent pleasure to enjoy others’ miseries? Or is their mind brimming with material, resulting in an absolute compulsion to relieve themselves?
There are some people who never go out and gossip. They are addicts to TV serials. It is also an indirect expression of finding secret pleasure in unpleasant events, of dramatic characters, revealing a gossiping mentality.
Gossip is not something new to India. Even Lord Rama sent Sita on exile, being influenced by a rumour spread by a washerman, under the pretext of Raja Dharma.
Gossip which earlier originated from pyols (thinnai) of houses and prakarams of temples, has taken a different avatar called “chat” or “communication”, and occupies the centre stage of every home. Old wine in a new bottle!
Elections round the corner, party rumours, stock market forecasts have a massive influence on the political arena, leading to either landslide victory or mud slinging.
My nephew, an IT professional, however speaks highly of gossips, since rumours about merger/downsizing enable him to polish his resumé and keep mentally alert for any eventuality. People who are highly intelligent and have a quest for knowledge and even those who are in problematic situations are not averse to rumours. It plays an important role in criminal investigation.
Gossip is an integral part of society and you cannot escape it in the remotest corner of the world. Better love and learn to live with gossip. We may well break the word to god and “sib” (short for sibling) to unlock the secret behind the omnipresence and eternity of gossip?