We have a Sunday market near our housing society where one can buy vegetables, fruits and all sorts of things. My friend Creative Ram drops in now and then. I just love to watch him shop. When he buys something the price gets cut to 25% of what the seller first asks for.
But the last time was a real eye-opener. Someone brought an elephant to the market and put it on sale. I thought that it was a joke. But Creative Ram immediately walked up to the elephant’s owner and asked him how much he was selling it for. On hearing the astronomical sum the owner quoted, Creative Ram did not bat an eyelid. He told me to wait and see how he would buy the elephant for the price of a mouse. When I asked him why on earth he wanted to buy one, he told me that he felt a certain brotherly concern for it. Well, I did not know how to respond to this answer for Creative Ram is indeed of a size and girth that makes one feel like Gulliver in the land of Brobdingnag.
In a few minutes, Creative Ram had told the owner about a lot of defects of the elephant and made him aware of rules — that he was violating — on keeping animals, and the fact that the elephant actually looked like a rather large mouse. After he told the owner that he was in danger of being arrested the owner offered some money to take the elephant off his hands. Creative Ram magnanimously offered to do it for free.
When I asked, Creative Ram said the elephant would be kept in the society’s park and provide joyrides to children. The society would make money and the maintenance expense would come down. Even its dung would be sold as manure. And as we were taking care of a sacred animal, the Delhi Jal Board was bound to supply free water. The society could also loan the jumbo to other societies for religious events.
Even the problem of feeding the elephant was none, according to Creative Ram. He vowed to spread the word through pundits that those who would feed the elephant would be blessed. He would hang a few posters with Sanskrit shlokas on the elephant and put vermillion on his forehead. Whoever pleased it would get wealth, a good wife, marks, health and what not.
Before I could ask who would handle it Creative Ram caught hold of the elephant’s trunk and pulled him towards the society gate. As usual the president of our society was sitting there. Seeing the elephant he bluntly told Creative Ram that we already had a parking problem in the society. Creative Ram pointed out that he had brought the elephant to solve it. In case a vehicle was parked improperly the elephant would dump it somewhere else or even outside and the vehicle owner would behave himself next time. The president immediately agreed that the elephant would be very useful.
With his innovation, Creative Ram is bound to get a big grant from Delhi University. I plan to tag along so that I too can reap the benefits.