As they say, everything passes. And, we survive because we are survivors and we bounce back. We rise to the occasion and then we forget also. I had led a very sheltered and protected life and my husband’s sudden illness took the ground from under my feet. All my so-called education and sophistication could not grapple with the situation that fast. There were a hundred and one questions to be answered. What were his medicines, what was the dosage of his insulin – I had no clue. Even now when I think back, I feel ashamed and guilty. I did not simply know.
The day he was admitted into the hospital, I had to look askance at him for an answer to all his health-related queries and he tried to supply the answers in between his gasping breaths. We used to discuss so many other things like bank accounts but never about the medication he was having. He was diabetic but was perfectly active. There ended the matter and I had never bothered about that part.
But the one month spent at the hospital was an eye-opener. Caution became my middle name. I learned by rote the names of all his medicines. It also taught me that one has to keep on believing in the doctor, in the medicine and above all, in that super power.
It also has taught me that one should never be complacent when it comes to wellness and illness, that it is always better to avoid across-the-counter medication, especially if you have diabetes or blood pressure. I took a vow to be as vigilant as ever from then onwards. Human mind is like a dog’s tail – it is very difficult to keep it straight for long.
My resolution also lasted for four months. Once the mind sensed that the red alert is over, it started relaxing and after nearly three years, I am back to square one. It scares me at times but again my subconscious mind finds no reason why I should unnecessarily mug up the mundane details of his medical file. Recently I was sharing this with my friend, in a self-deprecatory tone. She tutted in sympathy. ‘I know, I know. Now look at this.’
With a knowing smile, she pulled out her mobile, searched the photogallery and held it out to me. Neatly tucked away were photos of her family’s prescriptions. ‘Whenever you get a new one, take a photo, tag it and keep; and remember to archive the old one; that way you can avoid the unnecessary clutter’. Not only for selfies but for self too…I felt like kissing that instrument then. There is a saying that goes, God locks you up but He also leaves you the key. I never knew that the key would be in the gallery.