Remembrances haunt me as I see my 88-plus father admitted to the ICU of a hospital near my residence in Delhi for over a week, or when I think of the ordeal he is undergoing. So integral to me in the preceding six years after my mother’s demise has been his benign presence that the inkling of separation unnerves me. A lively, articulate soul is now lying hapless, helpless and lonesome on the ventilator with inviting eyes when I am around during visiting hours. Attending doctors ask me to wait and see.
Known for his outspoken, jovial and inspiring demeanour and witty observations at work, family and social circles, none ever having interacted with him could remain unmoved. The embodiment of the sages’ precept of enriching values rather than material assets, he never compromised and educated his five children to the highest level on a small salary, instead of asking us to grab a job. For decades he spent winters in cotton trousers and an overcoat. An avid newspaper reader—a trait my brother and I inherit—he would share issues concerning us that we missed, including job vacancies. It was on his information that I applied, got selected, and served two establishments in my career. Disciplined in routine and meals, we could not offer him an extra morsel. After dinners, he would insist on guests to either stay, or else depart timely. Unhappy at my working till late night hours, he often admonished me—God has created day and night equal, do the day’s work in daytime.
His respect for others’ feelings was remarkable. When my daughter was being admitted to school, he preferred the name ‘Suchitra’ though I wanted ‘Silogi’, after a hilly town in my native place in Uttarakhand that had a big role in developing that region. I completed the school registration form he gave me—except for the candidate’s name which I left to him—and rushed to office. Honouring my wish, he wrote down what I wanted—‘Silogi’. As another gesture of his magnanimity, he broke an age-old tradition by not accepting cash envelopes at my marriage.
Until his organs started malfunctioning recently, he never permitted anyone to wash or iron his clothes despite a weakened shoulder. Minimally dependent on others, he has ever been an asset to all. Whenever my wife or I went out on an errand, he would bless us: Vijayee Bhav. After few moments of my daily massaging his feet at bedtime that gave me immense satisfaction, he would say: “That’s enough. You have so much to do!”After their role on Earth, noble souls stay with their children, guiding and directing them to virtuosity, if one believes it. This thought helps me sustain.
Email: teenbarthwal@gmail.com