BENGALURU: While the central government decided to mourn queen Elizabeth’s death, social media wasn’t as kind. She ruled over a country that colonised most of the world, looted and enslaved people, and fought hard to ensure nations did not win their independence.
All my life, I have met people who would argue that the British gave us the railways. That they taught the nation English, and gave us our one national adhesive - cricket. The British created hill stations around the country, giving middle-aged and teenage couples a break from the sun and sweat of the plains.It’s an argument that has often baffled me. The aforementioned factors weren’t the result of British benevolence. Indian Railways was created to transport supplies for the empire. English helped the colonists traverse the many linguistic challenges that India posed. And the hill stations helped British officers catch a break from the heat of India. It’s like saying Katappa killed Bahubali so that he could merge with God!
I find it absurd that we continue to give the British credit even though they pillaged our nation for two centuries. But then, I wondered - was I being myopic in my view? Surely there must be some advantages to the British empire. Further introspection made me realise that there were in fact SOME benefits of British rule in India.
If the British hadn’t kept us poor for centuries, we would have nothing to look up to in life. No aspirations as a nation, no foreigners visiting us through NGOs. What fun is it to be a rich economy, after all? We wouldn’t have poor, malnourished kids roaming all over the country. How would we then take those moving pictures for our Instagram feed? We must thank the queen for helping us up our photography game. The British also carefully manipulated food stocks in India and caused massive famines in India. But I guess we must be thankful to the empire for inadvertently giving Indians a lean body that gym-goers today aspire to achieve!
Before the British arrived, India was the land of a hundred languages - each with their own scripts, grammar, and literature. The British empire united the nation by introducing us to English. This gave entire generations an inferiority complex, ensuring that we don’t become egoistic, and remain humble. From a country whose languages offered no confusion between the written and spoken word, we became a nation that struggles everyday with words like ‘colonel’ and ‘debris’. To add to our woes, we have to tolerate the English commentary by Sanjay Manjrekar every time there is a cricket match. What a great move by the ever-benevolent queen!
The British ensured that we went from an export-surplus nation to one that was heavily dependent on imports to survive. What a masterstroke! They took away all those boring khadis and cotton apparel, and introduced us to suits and trousers to be worn in 40 degrees heat. We also got Western toilets, and with them came the nightmare of walking into a five star hotel and finding only tissue papers available! For the rest of the world, ‘Elizabeth’ is a royal name. In India, it is used as sarcasm - ‘Oh! As if you’re some Elizabeth. Go in an auto!’.
The British made us a nation insecure of our own culture - so much so that Indian brands hire foreign models and call themselves Allen Solly and Peter England. They emptied our coffers for centuries. But I guess we wouldn’t have gotten the amazing show The Crown without her. And for all these reasons, we must all be thankful to the queen! (The writer’s views are his own)