Beware of bullies

Last month, a 15-year-old student died by suicide, allegedly after facing school bullying. TNIE looks at the prevalence of school bullying in the state and how to tackle the menace
Beware of bullies
Express
Updated on
5 min read

"I have three children. And all of them have at some point experienced bullying. My 10-year-old son was bullied for being overweight, not just by classmates but also by teachers.”

“My daughter was subjected to passive-aggressive treatment by some of her so-called friends. They cut her off and also instigated others to stop talking to her. ”

These are statements from two mothers whose children experienced bullying at school. The cases are many. However, none of them came out in the open.

But the tragic death of a 15-year-old in Kochi was an eye-opener for Keralites. The boy was allegedly bullied by his schoolmates for his skin colour, made to lick the toilet seat, and his head forced into the toilet and flushed. And in January, the boy jumped off from the 26th floor of his apartment where he was living with his parents. 

Now, the story is known to all, even across the country, after hitting headlines for over a week with politicians like Rahul and Priyanka Gandhi taking it up and the state government ordering a high-level probe into the case.

According to parents, psychiatrists and various surveys, this is not a one-off incident. Bullying is highly prevalent in schools across the state in varying proportions, they say.

“Such incidents have increased a lot in recent years. Of the youngsters who come to me seeking help, around 20 per cent are victims of bullying at school. This is a significant number,” says psychologist Jesna Sivasankar.

“Cases vary from patient to patient. However, the one common denominator is that the victims found themselves becoming the target after the aggressors identified a ‘weaknesses’ in them,” she adds. In many cases, she says, the teachers highlight these ‘weakness’ and later, the victims might even drop out without going for higher education after Class XII.

“Imagine, a case when their teachers turn bullies. What hope will they have when their classmates follow the teachers’ footsteps? The children withdraw into themselves, become depressed. If no remedial steps are taken, they might end up taking the extreme step like in the case of the 15-year-old,” says Jesna.

Numbers speak

However, when TNIE reached out to the authorities of some schools across the state, a surprising response came up. Most schools do not have any mechanism to prevent bullying while adding that there have been no incidents of bullying in their schools.

“There is no such thing in our school. These are one-off cases that hog the limelight, and then they are made to appear as a trend,” says the principal of a school in Thiruvananthapuram who does not wish to be quoted. A similar sentiment is voiced by a teacher Kendriya Vidyalaya. “No bullying cases have so far been reported in my 18 years of service,” he claims. 

However, as early as 2018, a couple of studies in schools in Thiruvananthapuram, Kozhikode, and Pathanamthitta, flagged the issue of bullying in schools. One was done by a group of researchers of the Central University of Kerala, Kasaragod. As per the paper, though there are not many studies, Kerala reported one of the highest rates of depressive disorders. The study states that Kerala has 646 mental disorders per 100,000 population, compared to an Indian average of 550.

Bullying, a predictor of poor mental health, thus had to be studied, says Prof. K R Thankappan, the retired head of Sri Achutha Menon Centre for Health Science Studies who was part of the study.

The study was conducted among 764 adolescents with a mean age of 13.3. According to the results, about 15.3% of students said they were bullied at least twice a month, 30% reported verbal bullying, 23.3% reported physical, 11% sexual, and 3.3% cyber bullying.

“Qualitative exploration shows that parenting is a cause for either victimhood or perpetration. Also, there is a lack of competence among teachers to address the menace,” Prof. Thankappan explains.

Another study by Sonia George, assistant professor and head of the department of psychology at Government College for Women, Thiruvananthapuram, analysed results taken from a sample size of 600 students in Thiruvananthapuram district. It showed 53.5% of students reported being bullied in some form or the other and 10% said they felt they did not feel safe in schools.

As per the findings, 81% of the bullying mostly occurs in classrooms, 33% in the lunch area, 15% outdoors, 12.5% in school buses, and 8.5% in places such as washrooms. Also, 50% reported bullying usually happens during break, lunch or recess, 24% during classes, 21% after school, and 13.5% reported it before school.

Teachers, parents and bullying

According to Priya K (name changed), when her son was bullied in school, she took action by contacting the parents of the students involved. “What troubled me the most was that a teacher too taunted my son,” she says. The teacher’s comment prompted the other students to continue the bullying unabashedly, she says.

“When I contacted, many parents never took corrective steps. Instead, they tried to find fault with the complainant. This acts as a fodder to the anti-social tendencies of the child. When he was below the age of 10, the bullying was aggressive, there was violence involved,” she says.

Tackling the menace

Psychologits also point out that school counselling system is not an effective mechanism to tackle the menace.

“School teachers and counsellors also fail to identify bullying mostly because the students are not aware that they are being bullied till they get to a point of extreme depression,” says Manasi J, a clinical psychologist.

She points to her own daughter’s incident. “Her friends told her she was not good enough and started alienating her from school activities. However, when she approached a teacher, she was mocked again. A 14-year-old was told that she isn’t good enough in a society where 60-year-olds are trying to reinvent themselves. I couldn’t digest it and I changed her school. In the new place, she became more confident and even led an entire team for a school event,” Manasi says. 

Tightening anti-bullying laws and implementing them in schools, akin to anti-ragging ones in college, could also help prevent bullying, Manasi says.

However, there is a catch. “It puts minors on the radar. Yet, to an extent anti-bullying cells will help. Students should be taught empathy and the need to be respectful from kindergarten. But not just students, teachers and parents should also be sensitised. Before all these, the first approach should be to accept that bullying is a reality,” says Manasi.

However, Jesna says anti-bullying or anti-ragging cells in schools will not help tackle the menace. “Such cells might work in government schools. But in private schools, it won’t serve the purpose as the cell will depend on the management and teachers,” she adds.

She also adds that a cousellor per one school is not adequate. “There are hundreds of students in school, and they can’t valuate all and identify the bullies. It should be a consolidated efforts of teachers, cousellors and parents.”

According to Indira Rajan, parents need to play an important role in creating a healthy atmosphere for children.

“They need to communicate more with their children to understand what they are undergoing at school. But today nobody has time to converse with their children,” she says, while adding that, there have been no reported incidents of bullying in CBSE schools in the state.

School teacher Maya Manesh agrees. Sensitising parents and teachers is the need of the hour, she says.

“Often, bullying goes unrecognised because the student-teacher ratio is too huge. Hence, counselling mechanisms should be strengthened and awareness should be given right from the start,” she explains.

“However, the recent incident in Kochi will make sure schools are on guard. I am optimistic,” she says.

What is bullying?

The UN defines bullying as intentional and aggressive behaviour occurring repeatedly against a victim where there is a real or perceived power imbalance, and where the victim feels vulnerable and powerless to defend himself or herself. Often, it occurs without any provocation. Children who bully usually act out of frustration or to achieve social status. Children who are bullied are likely to experience depression, anxiety and loneliness.

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