Children, in today’s family life, men will say that two plus two equals four. But as far as women are concerned, two plus two need not just be four; it could be anything. By and large, men are intellectual, and women are emotional. Reading this, women should not feel bad. Men have a feminine side to them just as women have a masculine side to them. In general, men make firm decisions, which usually do not yield to circumstance. If we know a man’s basic nature, we can safely guess how a man will act in a given situation. A woman is different. She will yield to circumstance; it is a weakness in her character. She has a compassionate heart. This heart-melting nature is the main reason for her suffering. For this reason, it is hard to say how a woman will respond in a situation.
The journey of life is undertaken with the intellect and the heart, which are like opposite directions. That is why there is often no peace and happiness in family life. Spirituality is the relative that brings together and harmonises the incompatible heart and intellect. It is the knot that binds both together. It is only when we give spirituality its due place in life that life fulfils itself. Usually, the intellect does not come down to the level of the heart, and the heart does not rise to the level of the intellect. This is what family life is like today.
Many women tell Amma, “Amma, I share all the anguish in my heart with my husband. But apart from grunting in acknowledgement, he doesn’t respond properly. For this reason, I’m not even sure that he loves me.”Amma would ask the husband, “Son, what is it that I’m hearing? Don’t you love this daughter?”
He would immediately say, “Amma, I love her with all my heart!”
Children, such love is like honey trapped inside a rock; we can never taste its sweetness. To taste its sweetness, the honey must come into our hands. Likewise, love is not meant to be withheld; it must be expressed at appropriate moments. Otherwise, the love a husband has for his wife will not satisfy her in any way. For as long as we cannot understand each other’s heart perfectly, it is not enough just to keep the love we feel confined to our hearts.
We must express it outwardly through our words and actions. Amma is saying all this for the sake of peace and happiness in family life. Doing otherwise is like putting an ice cube in the hands of someone who is dying of thirst; it will not help to quench his thirst just then.Therefore, men must meet women at their level. They must love each other with open hearts and strive to understand each other.The writer is a world-renowned spiritual leader