The tagline for this book reads: a solo living manual for the curious Indian woman. As manuals go, it is direct, helpful, and packed with information a woman, about to live alone, could parse to her benefit.
The one outstanding quality of Sumaa Tekur’s writing is her honesty. Table for One is written in first-person, and it is a voice that tells the reader, in clear unhesitant tones, of all the ups and downs of solitary living, with absolutely no holds barred.
She makes clear the vulnerabilities of living solo, like dealing with loneliness, acquiring abilities for yourself––starting from opening the tight lid of a bottle to managing your own money and coping with that ubiquitous nosy-as-hell neighbour. She spills the details also on cooking for one, navigating both mental and physical spaces that suddenly yawn open, how the occasional pang for the safety net of a partner crops up, and more.
There, however, rings a note of joyful ebullience through the pages. This is because the author gets off the ‘should I/shouldn’t I’ fence early enough, and even her cautionary tales carry the unwritten line: ‘But it’s all worth it.’
The two points repeatedly touched upon in the book prove to be something of a double whammy: one, that women living alone are regarded with an admix of pity and suspicion; and two, that solo living requires one to become comfortable enough with the silence around to be able to settle in and actually revel in it. Both perspectives are presented free of frills. The nosy neighbour can actually be offensive, hurtful, even noxious. The local shopkeeper could well serve everyone else, before coming to the lone woman standing there patiently for ages. Some men could construe a woman’s single status as an invitation and begin
to pile on. Thus, ingressions into the solo woman’s privacy come in all forms and ways.
Living alone is enriching, but also provides a great reality check of one’s mortality, says Tekur, adding that it is a learned experience. She analyses the topic, cuts down to its bones, and offers bulleted points for those interested to incorporate them into their lives.
She offers several tips to stock your solo armoury with––invest in yourself, face your fears head-on, and take complete charge of your security. She also suggests that you stand up for yourself––that one simple tip which always works––and draw firm boundary lines, and don’t, for a minute, regret the time you spend daydreaming or chilling.
And sooner or later, the reader realises this is a manual that not just single women, but every woman needs to read. Says Tekur: “If every woman in the world made elbow room for her own freedom in small and big ways, it could punch a billion holes in the veil of control, to allow the light through to reach one-half of the population.” Now if that doesn’t resonate, what will?