"No one,” Aristotle once said, “would choose a friendless existence on condition of having all the other good things in the world.”
More than two millennia later, the Greek philosopher’s observation still feels current.
The need for companionship has remained constant. What has, however, changed is where people now look for it.
Daily life has become a constant race against the clock, leaving little room for conversation. Friends and family may still be only a tap away, yet not always available at the moment someone needs reassurance, advice or simply a space to think aloud.
Now we have a new kind of companion — an AI chatbot that is always online, and never says, “I will get back later.” Ever-ready with advice, suggestions, reassurance, and even an e-shoulder to cry on.
Twenty-three-year-old Theertha does not remember exactly when talking to AI became part of her daily routine. It did not begin with loneliness, nor did she set out looking for a digital friend.
At first, the exchanges were practical. She sought help with a college presentation, a birthday message she could not quite word and an email to a professor.
Then the questions became more frequent and personal.
‘Which outfit looks better?’
‘Does this message sound too harsh?’
‘Am I overthinking this?’
“Earlier, I would pose such questions to my friends. Now I ask AI first. It’s become an involuntary reliance,” she laughs.
Theertha does not call the chatbot a ‘friend’. Yet, she admits, it has quietly taken over conversations that once belonged to friends.
The attraction lies in its readiness. It does not seem distracted, impatient or weighed down by problems of its own. There is no need to wonder whether it is a good time to call, whether one is oversharing or just being silly or sly.
A request to rewrite an email can turn into a conversation about workplace stress. A question about a text message can open into doubts about a relationship. And, of course, any dirty secret is considered okay within the chatbox.
What begins as assistance can gradually move into emotional territory, often without the user noticing the transition.
Multimedia professional Ammu K has noticed this shift. She increasingly turns to AI for everyday decisions — from choosing a skincare routine to deciding whether an outfit suits an occasion or getting a second opinion on makeup.
“Everyone is busy with their own lives, and I don’t want to keep bothering them over small decisions,” she says.
“It’s also a very private, non-judgemental space. Sometimes I don’t even need the perfect answer. I just want a little reassurance. AI is pretty good at pep talk.”
She has noted a similar change in her mother’s routine as well. “I was surprised. What began as curiosity has become a habit for her. Whether she is looking for a new recipe to try or ideas for home decor, AI is often the first ‘adviser’ she turns to,” Ammu laughs.
At the centre of such ‘companionships’, notes psychiatrist Dr Amithabh Sajeev, is the feeling of being heard.
“Companionships do more than ease loneliness,” he explains. “They help regulate stress and strengthen emotional security.”
It is this feel-good factor that makes people turn to AI. “When people feel heard without immediately receiving advice, they experience a deep sense of relief and emotional safety,” says Dr Amithabh.
“Humans often instinctively respond to distress by offering solutions or quick fixes. But the urge to solve a problem at once can sometimes prevent us from truly listening and become a barrier to genuine connection.”
Used in that way, AI can act as a sounding board. It can help someone slow down before sending an angry message, work through what they want to say or find language for an emotion they have not yet understood.
As Theertha says, “Sometimes I don’t even need an answer. I just need to vent, or organise my thoughts.”
The problem, however, begins when the ‘comfort corner’ replaces genuine interpersonal conversations altogether.
“Human relationships are rarely seamless. People misunderstand, disagree, interrupt and sometimes fail to respond in the way one hopes. They also have needs, boundaries and bad days of their own,” says psychiatrist and author Dr Arun B Nair.
“A chatbot brings none of that friction. It remains available on the user’s terms. It does not become offended or offer an inconvenient point of view unless prompted to do so. That ease is also what concerns.”
Human communication, he says, involves far more than exchanging words. It requires people to read facial expressions, notice changes in tone, interpret body language, deal with disagreement and respond to another person’s emotions.
“When we interact with humans, we learn to adjust, understand reactions and correct our own behaviour. These experiences contribute to personality development and communication skills,” he says.
“AI can imitate the language of empathy, but it does not participate in a relationship in the human sense. It does not have perspectives shaped by lived experience.”
This distinction becomes particularly important for children and teenagers, whose social skills are still developing.
“When a child interacts only with a system that responds instantly and agrees easily, they may miss opportunities to develop the ability to handle different opinions and complex social situations,” notes Dr Arun.
“Only disagreements and awkward conversations teach young people how to apologise, wait, negotiate, manage frustration and recognise another point of view.”
The risk, therefore, is not merely that people may spend too much time chatting with AI. It is that they may begin to prefer relationships in which the other party makes no demands.
There is also the danger of handing over too much decision-making.
A person may begin by asking AI how to word a message, then whether to send it, how to interpret the reply and what to do next.
Over time, the chatbot can move from helping organise thoughts to shaping choices that would otherwise require personal judgement or discussion with someone who understands the wider context.
Its confidence can also be misleading. An answer may sound assuring even while being incomplete or wrong.
Dr Arun cautions users against blindly going by AI responses. “Information should be checked against reliable sources, particularly when it concerns health, medication, money, education or other important decisions,” he stresses.
He also notes that cases of over-dependence on AI and excessive emotional bonding with bots are on the rise.
“AI should be treated as a supportive tool, not as a substitute for human relationships,” says Dr Arun. “Never confuse usefulness with friendship.”
This story was reported by Nidhi Vinod & Parvana K B for TNIE - Kerala.