Many women dream of a romance that will blossom from a glance in the street. But when it's not mutual, then this “rom-com” can slide into a horror film! It was funny in the first few days when he chased me down the street on a two-wheeler, as I rode to work from home. Initially, I never took him seriously. I thought he was some random jobless guy! It stopped being funny when it became a routine – it continued almost for three weeks.
The creepy stalker stopped me every day and softly described how he found my body parts desirable. It gave me violent nightmares and a sense of isolation, and yet I didn’t tell my parents. They are old.
He started following me and also tried to find out where I live.
"Hey. I am interested in you. Can we go on a date? You have a good physique. Why don't you respond, woman? How long you are going to make me wait," he said once.
I didn't respond. I thought if I didn't talk back, he would not come again. I assumed wrong.
I still didn't take any action; I didn’t want to approach the local police station, as I thought it would somehow eventually stop.
It never did.
He used to wait at the end of the street everyday between 12.30 and 1 pm. That's when I regularly come to work. A few well-wishers suggested I change my route. "Avoid your two-wheeler, come by an auto or a taxi. Don't let things get aggravated. Your safety is important," they said.
A couple of days later — I think it was a Sunday — the IT parks near on the way were shut. By 11.30 am, the sun was blazing as I reached Guindy, and my two-wheeler chose to break down. Unable to find a two-wheeler workshop nearby, I decided to push my vehicle and walked all the way to office about 2 km away.
I was praying hard that the stalker wouldn’t be there. But I saw him standing in the same place as always.
He came running to me and asked, "May I help you?" and caught hold of my hands. "I love you," he said, flashing a smile.
I lost my cool. It was freaking me out. I asked him to stop.
I had finally developed the courage to confront him.
"Are you civilised and educated? You are neatly dressed up; I think you must be working for some IT company! I know that I look attractive. But have you looked yourself into the mirror? You look disgusting. Absolutely. The next time I see you stalking me, I'll file a complaint with the police. Get it?" I shouted. All these days, I remained quiet, but I don't know what made making me say all this that day.
"Women like the thrill of being chased, right?" he laughed.
"I know if I keep doing this, you'll somehow talk to me. But... I am sorry! You were quiet. So, I thought you were equally interested in me. Had you told me this the very first day, I would have stopped waiting or stalking you (however, you name it)," he said.
I was shocked by his explanation.
"You sound narcissistic. Don't attempt to justify your behaviour. I feel like a nuisance. No means 'no'. It can never be 'yes'. When some women like me say 'no'. It f***ing means 'no'," I said.
And you know what? I didn't see him from the next day.
That day I realised, men are like predators, they prey on their targets and when they know what they want, they go for it at all costs. I realised that I need to fight back. Other women must too.
(SS is a feature writer with the New Indian Express)
Have you been stalked? writetous@newindianexpress.com